yes this was very easy to understand.........simplistic to put across your point.....no punches were pulled in this one......you had something to say and you said it......pretty good for a first drop.......a very uneven type of flow but it still worked i liked the structure because it made it seem like a one-way conversation...the way words would look if you were talking to yourself.......

everything looked so good at first but that was my minds eye
^lots of inner meaning in that line.....made me stop and say whoa!

overall this was a very good piece i look foward to your future work..........