yo i thought that was ok for a first post, it was pretty simple, but ull get better at addin multis and wordplay in ur verses. i thought the vocab was ok, and the topic was a little played.
my favorite lines were,
"imagine a world where everyone was the same/
no racist claims, no fame, no1 hanging there head in shame/"
i thought that was pretty tight.
hold ur chin up and keep postin man, ull elevate.

peace.....