Thread: Sons of Man
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Old 10-04-03, 01:09 PM   #2
Dirty Sally
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That was hard to read, to put it simply. I couldn't see a flow to it. Though it's structured there's no wordplay, metis or multies. I would suggest making it easier to read, put a flow to it. And use more wordplay, metis and multies to make your drops more interesting to read.
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