"That I didn’t drowned due to depression/
Cus ive got something 2 live 4 this lesson/"

Your use of correct English and incorrect or "slang" in one
paraphrase makes the piece shaky..
Also it's because you used all these "dictionary" words, I call
them, and then you have only one abbreviation (" Cuz" ).

"Ive learned is invaluable 2 me/
And my girl defines beauty truly/
I use2 be mentally poorly through all the lies/"

Here you spoke about three different things in that exact order
try to stay on subject when you write. You have to try to
single on one emotion that is streaming out instead of six
or seven. All in all it was okay keep on writing.

__________________
<BR><h3><color=black><center><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=left LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 width=300>*~*~*Lady Wun*~*~*</MARQUEE></color></center></h3>
<BR>
<BR><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=up LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 height=100> <center><font color=000000><I>*~*~*~*~*</p>I'm invisible to the unseen eye</p>I'm undeniable strength</p>*~*~*~*~*~*</p>Merk Squad</MARQUEE></center><I>