ok dawg first off i see potential here.you tried to sorta tell a short story so it was a nice topic,for most part flow was alright but by tryin to even out your bars more it would improve this,vocab was descent,i see you only have 4 posts so as you get used to doin more peices and writing like full songs you will improve.Although this was a descent drop but short,jus keep'em cumin dawg.

Hit mine up if you have a spare minute.


Peace