Yeah i agree...it was ok...your structure could have been better, a bit weak...it flowed alright though as i read it...your vocab was alright too...content was good i thought...try to make your lines the same length though....but overall it was a ok drop...keep at it..and keep dropping.
and if you could return some feedback..
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=86721