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Aint Nobody Iller Than Me
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IP:
Quote:
Originally posted by Seraphe
i didntt like this actually, storyline was there but it was really basic, transition needs a lot of work, a lot of your rhymiung was basic 1 and 2 syllable rhyming, the internals didnt work with this, structure was decent, but you worded the lines pretty poorly, and that seemed to throw the imagery off as i read it, lost my attention on a couple of occasions, thats down to bad writers voice, you didnt do the topic justice to be fair, i take it your new to topicxal / story telling pieces so i wont be too harsh on you
elevate.
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This song wasn't meant to be filled with 5 syllable words and all that. I just wanted to keep it basic and get my point acrossed. Ya feel me? |