This was great! Had such an Asimov feel to it...well to me anyway lol My Dad is a huuuuge Asimov fan so I love works such as this...
The opening line was perfect, there is no way I could not keep reading.. The subtle cliches and nuances were so well placed and never over used.. They didnt distract from your piece in the slightest.

i dont wanna be a puppet, corporate trojan workhorse/
emotional social discord inside the belly of an equestrian
my pocket watch works orange/

This is really cleverly written.
I dunno why people are sleeping on it..

Kudos know1.

__________________