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Old 11-22-03, 12:42 PM   #13
Thrust
wanna play doctor????????
 
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Deacon deffinately got this...

Emotion..i'd get lost in ur rhyme scheme...really...
work on a better structure...the story wasn't all that good...
imagry was iffy... n all that...

Deacon...this was quite nice...started off decent...
n seemed to keep on improving as it went..
had some killer flow to it...great imagry

vote-deacon