Nice for a random structureless rant. I am so familiar with this type of style, it's so abstract it makes sense here. You are just freely writting on a feeling and situation, so no need for all the complexities of traditional poetry. You could have done more with the ryhme scheme, in my mind that was the only problem I seen. Not so much a problem but something Iwould improve on. Sounds like you two had a good time. Props on your openness, it's not an easy thing to be open.

Bounce./...

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FUCKA BABYLON BANDIT!!!