You need to post 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback in or this will get deleted..

But this was ok...your structure in this one was better than the other one i read, still try to make the lines around the same length though...your flow was alright, but you need to add multies and internals to it to make it better...vocab was ok, could be up'd though....overall this was alright....keep at it.