west.. this is the 1st iv read from you...
the imagry was there, but i think you could have expanded on your lines... both verse got to the point, but i think they could have been about 4-6 longer with an expand on the imagry...besides that it was good

Ed...
umm, why were you streatching like that...i know you can cut lines shorter than that... makes you out of breath to get threw that...the last 3 lines went so far that they threw the flow off

good job gents, and take my advice how you want

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