Opener: Lyrical
Closer:Lyrical
Structure: Lyrical
Flow: Lyrical
Metaphors:none

Not bad for Newbies. Could have been a lot more strong if you took the time to think. WHy don't you newbies, instead of have'n 15 min battles, and come'n off weak, set a longer due date, so your verses can get stronger, then peeps can give you feedback, and with practice you will elevate.

Vote = Lyrical

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