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IP:
This could have used alot of work before your dropped it
You could have fixed up your structure alot, made it easier for the reader to read your
peice...Next you could have used better wordplay and vocab,
Punchlines were iight , pretty much most of them were played out..
And have been used before... Multies were okay alittle here and there..
I felt you could have used alittle more mutlies , and even out your bars..
Made the reader not want to read this drop because it was
so disorganized... Overall this was an iight Freestyle, could have been alot better
next time try to edit your structure , and use mroe direct punchlines
and hard personals ,
DROP A LINK OR THIS WILL BE CLOSED
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The Competition
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