I stumbled down my street at 12pm already drunk, wearing a team ireland soccer jersey, and shouting at random pass-me-byers "Happy St. Patricks day!" "haha you too!!" they'd say back, to which I'd reply "Yea you don't fucking care you're not even wearing green haha" and laugh at their dirty looks

Then I rode the GREEN LINE in the montreal metro station and started shouting on the subway "I'm the only person in this whole metro cart wearing green? That's fucking SHAMEFUL. YOU SHOULD ALL BE ASHAMED!" and they would just look away and pretend I wasn't there.

Then I almost got kicked out of Mcdonalds at 11pm cuz after I ordered a trio and he asked "what kinda drink" I was like "Beer!" and the managers face was sooooooooo straight dude didn't even laugh. I was like "root beer dumb ass..."

And then I started yelling about how no one in the place new they were eating at a Irish fast food restaurant. MCDONALDS is a fucking irish name and the founders were irish-americans.

hoollaaaaa