to add my two cents i'm gonna critique this constructively.

there was some crazy imagery in here, which didnt make sense in places. the vocab was good but occasionally over the top, some really good individual lines here

by their display of graceful caligraphy finess,its evenly propotioned,not one sign of ignorance//
deliverance...the existance of the inevitable distance of time is tickin by with every second//

nice^^ but try and put this work in lines like to make it easier to read, i had trouble catching the rhythm to this piece.you refine your style a little and you got the potential to be just plain ill.#

keep posting.