Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Apostrophe
lmao this is actually a very good piece.. i felt it hit very hard the whole way thru.. oddly enough the first two lines were my least favorite.. i feel when opening a poem.. the first cuplet should be the hardest hitting.. and it really didnt catch my attention especially how u said crimson twice in one cuplet.. but i read the whole way thru.. and it picked up.. and its probably the best piece up right now.. good job..
|
Repeating the word crimson was done perposely, it's repitition, a poetic technique, and this wasn't the kind of poem to start off with as hard hitting, it's gets you warmed up or wt/v, it starts off and then gets into it, the way this was done and the concept, I woulda fucked it all up if my made my starting sentance hard hitting, but thanks for the feed back, i'll RTF soon