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Old 12-26-05, 08:36 PM   #16
B. Magik
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You had some pretty good points in there. Stay up and keep droppin bro.
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Old 12-26-05, 08:40 PM   #17
allik war
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thanx man u too homie stay up fam uppin this
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Old 12-27-05, 09:42 PM   #18
allik war
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c'mon hataz i kno u wanna say sumtin about my diss 2 u illiterate...inconsiderate fucks....or did i finally prove u hataz wrong n shut u faggots the fuck up? holla
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Old 12-27-05, 11:08 PM   #19
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no structure didnt flow at all no punches or good ones anyway
tell u tha truth i stopped reading get structure fam and keep writing
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Old 12-28-05, 05:03 AM   #20
allik war
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wut u talkin about flow was good if n e thing i needed 2 fix on it was structure......my punches were on point....each and every single 1 of them....jus peep the beef every1 got wit me in all of my threads.....but thanx 4 da real feedback....but trust me i kno wut i gotta work on fam
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Old 01-13-06, 05:44 PM   #21
Underdogg
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Man u need to fix ur structure, its all over the page. Ur lines are very basic.. "dont u know dicks are for chicks", "but y am i telling u this...shit i aint got shit else 2 do but 2 humor and taunt poor excuse 4 tryin 2 b a bully", etc. U should work on ur metaphors and punches, thats what makes diss tracks hot. Cause those two right there make up ur wordplay, which is where its all at.

But, u had some nice vocab in the middle of the song, but they were nothin but fillers.

Keep workin.

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