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10-08-04, 05:18 PM | #1 | ||||||
Banned: Biting
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Some deep shit here. Feedback Please.
IP: FE07 2ACC
I look at myself in the mirror but it cracks,
I feel trapped in my own mind and dats a fact, My moma and dad fightin wit each other every day, They dont seem to care if my life goes anyway, And den backstabbers comin at me wit huge knives, Bullyin and bitchhin, not carin bout anyones lives, And and I cant say nothin, cuz Ill get kicked around again, Im tired of hangin wit these sad excuses for men, Dis is all true, I hope to hell you can here what Im sayin, Even if its roastin hot outside, inside me it seems to be rainin, Anger and jealousy seem to be all around me, Im shoved into shit so much my brain gets cloudy, So now Im out, but remember dis is all true, I feel a lot of pity if the same applies to you. |
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10-09-04, 04:32 AM | #2 | |||||||
Light Weight
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IP: 0349 9F1D
pretty good I think...although with the words I could see it being more of an open mic then a poem (dats, dem, dis etc)...but still thought it was a pretty good poem.
Favorite Line: Even if its roastin hot outside, inside me it seems to be rainin check out my poem http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=153786 |
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