|
|
|
|
| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
02-06-04, 10:38 PM
|
#1
|
||||||
|
Guest
|
Equal Reactions
IP: 65E8 9804
So that was the situation, incubation against the rotating hands the audience- round table span, linger in heed of dialogue designed to this common center of the souls, the vocation stand foreign eyes await inevitability, character- breathing fireballs Written off as a mythical creature, because life flipped a role started as an anxiety barrier, but this anomaly become normality It hummed formality, as the distress widened, I itched to fold and then at the very moment I scratched, it begun this allergy As irritating as it must have been, I had to go back for more it festered my soul, with no nostrum for this subdued posture It could win me an Oscar, best performance as I smacked the floor I never act to snore, it controls all in this unglued Opera So I'm here, with these strangers hanging onto every single word my life organized in their journals with scripted illustrations Depicted as patience depletes and it's etched in fickle terms how this could possibly get any worse & if instinct is a wasteness? I feel subtle in this atmosphere, here for some coping feedback or to focus in fact, can't help thinking it's a fictional anecdote Ran my lips too far, its not too late, oxymoronically evoking retract assuming how the masses will brand me- the analytical antidote Atleast 3 of these onlookers have strolled in my Reebok Classics so their outlook on my burden is surely a pre-empted conclusion Sharp points of view aren't considered intrusions, they're answers! even the solution to rewrite the enigma of my retentive confusion Hoping this ringed diatribe has me seeking for the karma in dreams I must admit I reckon we're in full flight on this mayday evening Everyone's giving me reasons to be a hero against our arch enemy But I don't know what to think, this being my first AA meeting |
||||||
|
|
02-06-04, 11:29 PM
|
#2
|
|||
|
Fuck You, I Rhyme Better
|
IP: D575 0310
my main, and only problem with this....the rhyme scheme was hard to catch (im too used to simple ones)...umm yea...this was great
the vocab was top notch, no over use and none seemed forced it festered my soul, with no nostrum for this subdued posture It could win me an Oscar, best performance as I smacked the floor I never act to snore, it controls all in this unglued Opera i didnt catch the posture/opera rhyme...probably a pronunciation difference between us sides that this was great if you would be so kind http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...089#post1163089 |
|||
|
|
|
02-07-04, 12:27 PM
|
#3
|
|||||||
|
ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
|
IP: 4577 CD9A
this guy is always top notch when he posts
shit was very damn good..I cant find any errors. I enjoyed this a lot...
__________________
MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> |
|||||||
 
|
|
|
02-07-04, 10:27 PM
|
#4
|
|||||||
|
Guest
|
IP: 65E8 9804
Quote:
Indeed...Although everything doesn't have to rhyme yuuuuuknow?! LOL Thanks you two |
|||||||
|
|
|
02-07-04, 11:49 PM
|
#5
|
|||
|
Sand
|
IP: 9588 E886
holy lord ..
your pretty dope, and no everything does not have to rhyme. this was an ill piece, you made something simple, something complex. the way you write is as always, mad original. keep doing your thing, and keep trying to be as cool as me. and also, answer my im's . love alex. |
|||
|
|
|
02-08-04, 10:57 AM
|
#6
|
||||||
|
Guest
|
IP: 65E8 9804
Thanks Mr. Sand
I'm hardly ever on AIM...its not my fault..I'll try to be there next time  |
||||||
|
|
|
02-08-04, 12:11 PM
|
#7
|
|||
|
...
|
IP: 3FF3 E3F2
I really appreciated the alternating line rhyme scheme, just cause noone does that anymore. Your vocab and imagery are orgasmic, as usual, and you writer's voice is ridiculously strong. You speak to me man....well, type, anyways.
good work =)
__________________
Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
|||
|
|
|
|
02-08-04, 12:13 PM
|
#8
|
||||
|
Banned: Spamming
|
IP: 399E F0FD
*Stamps* Legendary~
|
||||
|
|
|
02-09-04, 12:15 PM
|
#9
|
|||||||
|
Guest
|
IP: 65E8 9804
Quote:
I was just trying to be different Thankies for the replies =) |
|||||||
|
|
|
02-09-04, 05:38 PM
|
#10
|
|||||
|
Banned: Cheating
|
IP: 4577 CD9A
goddamn dawg!!! U need to be wrecognized for this shit for reel! U and Penskillz knock all these motherfuckers out!! aint nothin to improve in this piece...simply magnificent! keep that ill shit comin dawg and holla at me homie 1
|
|||||
|
|
|
02-10-04, 12:45 PM
|
#11
|
||||||
|
Guest
|
IP: 65E8 9804
Thankie son
 |
||||||
|
|
 |
| Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
| Display Modes | |
|
|
Linear Mode
