GUNGRAVE

The flames of hell burn red in my eyes
Heart full of adrenaline mixed with dispise
Demonically and proud I rise
To destroy my foes with 2 nines
Rage fills my soul as the bullet flies
Take pleasure as I hear my enemies cries
Saying they'll repent? thats all bullshit and lies
How in hell are you gonna stop a creature that never dies?

The deadliest assassin
My shit hits and restricts quick
A demon with revenge, an awesome hybrid
I destroy the nemises with a coffin
I give death with death isnt it ironic?

Spawned, I was not born
Kill to make my lust slow
Suddenly it starts to grow
Now Im shooting blindly with eyes closed
An evil grin on my face as my foes blood flows

Stalk my prey and give them chills
Paralyzed, my enemies stay still
Now its time to go in for the kill
I get an amazing thrill
Shoot through them and watch the blood spill
The streets turn red as blood fills

They claim to be brave
Until their lives i take
Then it begins to rain
All the heroes blood stains
Everyone dead and i still crave
All this done my me, wondering my name
GUNGRAVE

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wow that was a pretty violent written piece. your detail to this piece was done well. emotion was there, i could feel it stronger in the end. i found the intro good, and the outro was even better. your rhyme scheme i didnt really notice the first read throu, but it doesnt add or take much away from the piece. it was a good read

~Tera~
DONT HATE

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thanx, i try to keep it interesting. the violent level added to it in my opinion. thanx for the feedback filed. i can always count on u to give sum good feedback. keep it comin ppl.

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Very interesting peice! You kinda had me scared with all that anger and hate but yet in still managed to keep my attention. I like your style

keep doin ya thing

lol, dont worry i aint no crazy goth white boy. ima latino and its just about a killer character. yup, as u can tell from my record i got better luck at writing poetry than battlin.

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lol well still keep doin ya thing

Judging by that picture in your signature, I'm guessing GunGrave is some sort of Japanese anime film, hm?

Actually... what I had in mind when reading this was Spawn. Y'know, Al Simmons, Image Comics and all that. I think that's because I just got done watching the animated movie.

But damn if that didn't intensify the image in my head. Be interesting to see what you had for inspiration in writing this.

~Shalom~

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Quote:

Originally posted by Bruklor Nec is just dumb

I'm taking that as a compliment.

oh, i just had my imagination and a video game. by the way your very close, its not a anime movie, its a video game. the aura that the character generates and his image inspired me. i just intensified the soul of the character into me, and then into poetry.

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Pretty good piece other then the fact that it kinda was on some street type rap poetix at momments.. Nonetheless it was a good piece with some strong emotion and strong words to express that emotion to readers.. Imagery was very good in this as well.. Keep writin poet and return the favor.. Peace

Holla

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Sonz Of Enlightenment

upped, sum critizism by a skilled writer/critic would be nice. thanx, i need sumtin to improve upon.

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