[/B]you first, max 21 lines -- one round --- 5 votes to win

Alright illman, hows it in Philly?
Things round there getting a little chilly?
Your like the eagles, your silly, took a huge beating
And like them all you can do is watch your hopes fleeting
Cuz in this meeting ill merk ya ill work ya
Like I was berserk and you jerk yaself
Because you cant get a bitch, but guess what theres a glitch
But i guess its ok, Too busy "running your label"?
Im sorry to tell ya but i guess you aint able
And as it turns out, boy, your a lyrical fable
I put the nail in your coffin as im shutting the lid
Be glad that i did,forbid, I merked this kid

yo,
what you a capition "dickhead",/ you rapping " dickhead"
you really think you hot, you burning "dickhead"
i cooked you, i don't even know where you from,/ i heard you claim you raw, now i know that you done,/
you a rookie, you first mistake was spiting flows that nobody else would spit, but chicks and wineno's,/
how bout them eag's, we one from the chip,/ im winning it for'em,"rap league" killing you pricks,
why you even call me out, you waste my time,
you trash, you making me mad im wasting my mind,/ on this cat that write all his ryhmes from balled up paper,/
you weak you must be drunk you taking a sit,/ next to pirates wit red hats, wooden boats on beach," you sweet"


i killed you "who's next"

that sit at the end of my verse is surpose to be seat, thats one minor error,

(you weak, you must be drunk you taking a seat,/ next to pirates wit red hats, wooden boats on the beach, "you sweet")

UPPIN FOR VOTES

--------------------- Uppin 4 Votes ----------------------

uppin 4 votes 1111111111111111111111111111111111111111

------------------- uppin 4 votes ----------------------------------

upping number 2 ,,,,,,,,,,..........,,,,,,,,,.....

why wont anybody vote on this?? come on vote on this battle doooooooo itttttttt

you are listening to the lamp shade remix lamp shade remix 4

Yo Kinda Onesides Battle In My Eyes...illman Took This All The Way....captian U Are Too Basic...and Predictable...up Ur Vocab And Style Too.........u Had No Real Punches.....

Vote-illman

upping this for the last time, how abotu some votes?

--------------------------- uppin 4 votes ---------------------------------

Alright illman, hows it in Philly?
Things round there getting a little chilly?
opening starts alright, but i expected more in the form of a punch
Your like the eagles, your silly, took a huge beating
And like them all you can do is watch your hopes fleeting
um... Not that strong of a punch, not that strong of a metaphor
Cuz in this meeting ill merk ya ill work ya
Like I was berserk and you jerk yaself
kind of a filler, not really a punch, meta is off.. not really direct
Because you cant get a bitch, but guess what theres a glitch
But i guess its ok, Too busy "running your label"?
falling short on hard hitting punches
Im sorry to tell ya but i guess you aint able
And as it turns out, boy, your a lyrical fable
not really a hard hitting punch.. lacking a dope metaphor
I put the nail in your coffin as im shutting the lid
Be glad that i did,forbid, I merked this kid
not that good of a closer, lacked on a punch and a metaphor

overall your verse was kind of newbie, you had some attemped punchs, but nothing hard came across, you lacked on metaphors, could have used some multis in your flow, other than that your flow was alright


what you a capition "dickhead",/ you rapping " dickhead"
you really think you hot, you burning "dickhead"
i cooked you, i don't even know where you from,/
opening could be better, lacked on a hard punch... metaphor seemed a little off
i heard you claim you raw, now i know that you done,/
you a rookie, you first mistake was spiting flows that nobody else would spit, but chicks and wineno's,/
flows started falling off here... you have a little bit of direction there, still lacking on the whole metaphor side of the battle
how bout them eag's, we one from the chip,/ im winning it for'em,"rap league" killing you pricks,
why you even call me out, you waste my time,
you trash, you making me mad im wasting my mind,/
ok line, needs some rewording, work out the flow.. cept try and keep away from feeding off your opponents verse
on this cat that write all his ryhmes from balled up paper,/
you weak you must be drunk you taking a sit,/
kind of a weak punch... although it has potentual, i see what you were aiming for
next to pirates wit red hats, wooden boats on beach," you sweet"
ok attempt at a personal.. could have made the line slightly more clear though

overall you need to work on your punchs some.. then try coming across on your metaphor work out a better rhyme scheme and it should be dope..

vote-illman
he came across better with his punchs, a little less directed but harder hitting, came with a few more.

Return the favor and drop an honest vote
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=107532

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