who knew id jump on the mic on a website-
who might be listening-im tired of the little league-
i want the lime light-fuck tees and jeans-
What about the CREAM-what about my dream-
broke as a joke-
No demo no cash, my mash choked, no deniro-
strait up zero, no female to call mine-
just weed sales and pine-
dealing drugs with slime, im tired of crime being my grind-
dear god whens my time to shine-
but maybe im not crazy maybe yall are blind

MC_BARTOK:you sound like a whiney little bitch who learned how to rym from watching the whiney little bitch show. i hate all you honky devils thinkin they can rym when there really just whiney little bitches. the only drug your dealin is imodium a mother fucken d. im black and russion and if i ever share a cell with you ill make you wish you liked country music you dumb white bitch.

i disagree i think it was a farely good piece, with good flow
abit too short though, youll elevate over time

Yeah thi was ok.....just work on your structure a bit, try to even the lines up a little better, but it was alright i guess.....try to make it a little more complex.....flow in this was alright i thought....try adding some multies to it though.....but keep at it.

..This was average..maybe a little below average..your flow was okay..I guess..wordplay sucked..you can only get better...

Don't worry about him he is garbage. your shit was ok, i'd give it a D flow was good but need work with everything else.If u need any help feel free to PM me or get at me on yahoo or AIM or whatnot