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02-12-04, 11:50 PM | #1 | |||||||
New to RB
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Undefined Matter
IP: E985 0A46
[Intro]
As people wake at dawn from there sleep nothing they expected begin's to creep Cracks apear, leading nowere, but steep fire disolve's metal and heep.. They dont know what is coming but they hear marching, & druming And dont know what to expect.. Matter regenerate's, as the townsmon crowd the center-place slates penitrate, and atmospheric items bend the gate Eternal evil rise's and smashes the statue of David gratitude dissolve's, infernal ashes crash-threw, blatent No force holding them back, belief falls, and hate rise's red centers, and black falls apathetically in the human's iris To much power put into one's hands, the last seal stand's and a sword rise's from the depths of the shadows Seal's the bands, and fights off the Demon's.. The voice demands an explination.. "Who do you believe in?" "the greater good?, or hate,disprect,and crude?" The crowd's fell to there knee's begging for there forgivness but not one was perfect, not one was the witness. It ended, but then the serpent rose, to try to finish.. humans began to fall and deminsh like numbers Scald's on womb's as the sun-burn's, answers to the wonder's unleashed, but not able to be took in correctly But evidentally, the world didnt end.. the keys lay in my hands, but nobody to suspect me I grasped the dagger, & rose, unlocked the door, to the Infintry the fight lasted days, we won, but I had a stagger and a thorn lay in my clothes, my life was poor... Just a God MC....
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I try not to hurt people to bad when it comes to hip-hop.. Don't wanna break a young cats self esteem, when he steps up to this God MC. Quote:
Last edited by KaigE : 02-13-04 at 11:33 AM. |
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02-12-04, 11:55 PM | #2 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: E985 0A46
^blah up
__________________
I try not to hurt people to bad when it comes to hip-hop.. Don't wanna break a young cats self esteem, when he steps up to this God MC. Quote:
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02-13-04, 12:12 AM | #3 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: E985 0A46
ight, last up then im out
__________________
I try not to hurt people to bad when it comes to hip-hop.. Don't wanna break a young cats self esteem, when he steps up to this God MC. Quote:
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02-13-04, 11:11 AM | #4 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: 9077 C569
holy fuck, all i want is alil reply, drop a link ill return the favor.
__________________
I try not to hurt people to bad when it comes to hip-hop.. Don't wanna break a young cats self esteem, when he steps up to this God MC. Quote:
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02-13-04, 11:32 AM | #5 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: 9077 C569
upp
__________________
I try not to hurt people to bad when it comes to hip-hop.. Don't wanna break a young cats self esteem, when he steps up to this God MC. Quote:
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02-13-04, 12:26 PM | #6 | |||||||
See ya.
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IP: 87B0 7F3F
Unfortunately, the introduction was the worst part of your piece. . Hence, I had to force myself to read past that section; perhaps this is the reason for the lack of replies.
Anyway, this was an up and down showing. You'd have a stanza or two of conceptually sound, fundamentally sound, overall solid writing. Then, you'd have forced rhymes & bad content. Really, there were flashes of potential; unfortunately, the flashes were sporadic - in part due to the generic topic. Keep writing, & I wholeheartedly apologize for the lack of replies you've received. Post more up, I'll reply to almost all of them . . Don't get caught up in the site - go about your life first. Peace , Quality.
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Kevin - Patrick - Alex - John - Ian . . the artists formerly known as Word Perfect . . Still > you. R h y m e | V a n t a g e |
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