Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
02-15-04, 12:22 AM | #1 | |||
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Seconds Away
IP: A9A7 727D
I'm only here to see you in less than one sense of the word because as it would seem you are more likely to be heard it doesn't strike me as absurd; you were never one for formalities but I am still placing in third you took the pleasure right out of me no, don't be disheartened I'm still your favourite party favour so drink up, my hearty neighbour because this nectar is our savior I couldn't save her for the life of me well, the life of her I suppose what really is my melody without all the added prose? in the sunlight it still grows and expands into the tree of life but, I reside in third place because I didn't read the fine type ..the fine type you are though and tonight was our show you still hold my heart; know it's in the depths of scarborough and I think I possess your heart cause it's loveliness is here to stay in the form of your paint and art I'm still the third...because Second's Away... who gives a shit, third times a charm
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Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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02-15-04, 12:45 PM | #2 | |||
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IP: A9A7 727D
*sigh*
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Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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02-15-04, 01:39 PM | #3 | ||||||
Light Weight
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IP: 6D0E 69D5
ba da da da daaa Im lovin' it! as JT might say...
well it was a little rambling at the beginning but you really picked up at the end... the rhyme structure might be overly complex at points but it could be worked out.. im not sure cuz id have to hear you spit it... Not sure if you are a genius poet or if this piece is just hard to understand... but does this work mean anything?? {Peace} |
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02-15-04, 01:42 PM | #4 | ||||
Eddy.
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IP: 77D5 6AAD
Solid read here hombre, good writers voice, tho i thought the vocab could be upped at some places,
I'm still your favourite party favour so drink up, my hearty neighbour because this nectar is our savior Feld this , and the piece also as a just keyed down, .. resulted in a nice one =) . |
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02-15-04, 01:47 PM | #5 | ||||
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IP: A9A7 727D
Quote:
LMAO at the MacDonald's thing thanks for the feed, the piece is actually about a night spent with my girlfriend.
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Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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02-15-04, 02:14 PM | #6 | ||||||
Flyweight
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IP: F8F8 B78D
Check my reply on RNR.
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It's me - Bare Knuckles!
Yes.. the rumours are true. Alias: Atheist. The Creation! |
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02-15-04, 02:15 PM | #7 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: 202C A952
it was iight... i was feelin it... i mean the lines/bars were short... if it wasn't centered structure would look hella gay... but dat just me... i flip/fixed it so i guess its coo... it was digged tho.. nice lines in there tho most def
I'm still your favourite party favour so drink up, my hearty neighbour because this nectar is our savior dat ish was nice... lol... i was feelin dat outta the whole verse... good drop dunny Peep my ~A Bullet for yo thoughts~ Caesar - On3
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~Sitting In Elevation Position~ Free Agent Just A Sick Newbie Murked - Lust Lost - None |
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02-15-04, 02:19 PM | #8 | ||||
Banned: Spamming
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IP: 4577 CD9A
Nice work Maven...very easy to read and follow...I know you are equipped with an exceptional vocab,so I won't even bother mentioning it....^^.....I just wasnted to say this was a great work and I'm starting to like pieces more and more...peace..
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02-15-04, 10:23 PM | #9 | |||
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IP: A9A7 727D
thanks =)
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Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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02-16-04, 07:28 AM | #10 | |||||||
1E
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IP: 5AF5 5CA5
liked this, tight little read... not sure on the bar length, but thats the only thing id say... other than that dope drop....
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02-16-04, 09:00 AM | #11 | |||||||
Here's Lookin At You Kid
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IP: E110 691F
nice little piece....good imagry...okay topic....your flow of the short bars is what i liekd most....vocab was good...as were some metas....wordplay was eh....decent....
liked it tho good job
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