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View Poll Results: Who won this battle? | |||
flash | 5 | 100.00% | |
a k w o r d Z | 0 | 0% | |
Voters: 5. You may not vote on this poll |
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07-23-04, 03:23 AM | #1 | |
New Jack
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a k w o r d Z vs flash (Topical)
IP: 736D B1B5
Topic: Delirious
Due today before 12:00 AM (EST) 30 Line (15 Bar) Max uh huh....
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...on Point... Get Off The Bandwagon.
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07-23-04, 03:57 PM | #2 |
Banned: Biting
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IP: 1294 0BE9
iight this is my check in... 6 lines over but i dont care delirious *door opens and a troubled teenager enters his home* Hello darling, How did school turn out today? Honestly Ma', I'd rather repent thinking thinking that way.. ..For a prolonged time I've struggled to push my weight These school fools contain hate over every achievemnet i make.. ..So everything I've made gets a humiliated and a downgrade It's this shit I can't take! Baby calm yourselve, You have got to settle down! Settle down? HowdoYou expect me to be like now.. ..Corrupted, Mind on drugs, And can't turn it back around My heart rate beats harder than speakers from Speed of Sound.. ..Ears ringing ever so loudly I can't figure life out! I need the fuck out! I'm astonished in awed What has ever happend to you dear? Well listen here, Not everything is as how it appears.. People live in disguised for a countless adition of years My fait dims and smeres, One of my most dreaded fears.. ..Oh, How could i have let go hope... Why so many tears? I'm calling 911, Baby you're wrong in the head! Well indeed, I'm delirious and helpless like I was dead.. My mind can't process things like what's blue and what's red From surronding causes I'm lost off drugs in a flower bed.. Enjoying the beauty that burrows from the sky above.. ..How it feels so ensuring..But people only think negative towards drugs To me it's exploring wonders and trails of unknown peace.. So yes i'm delirious....But it's something granted I welcomed to me My own view on things...Grasped by the thefts Like a stolen identity...It just happens to be... The blind usher my present state of mind Luciously i engage the wrong's shown to me... The mountain's high...Peaks i'm misderected to climb I'm dumbfounded...Mislead by whom i trust.. Agrivated in disgust...Failure happens to be a must Through thick n thin i attacked with thrusts... But following their ways...leaves my composure combust Shadowing the blind influenced me life-long... And it's hard to go on...When rights are wrongs So confused is my soul...From dusk to dawn... But i can't see...The ritious pass to follow along |
07-23-04, 11:55 PM | #3 | |
New Jack
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IP: 269D 0C24
you extended the bar limit, i'm extending the deadline... i'll drop tomorrow
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...on Point... Get Off The Bandwagon.
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07-24-04, 05:52 PM | #4 |
Banned: Biting
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IP: 1C0F 1C11
im fine with that.... didnt really extend it jus went over:thumbup
but since i made the rules its okay |
07-25-04, 12:21 AM | #5 | |
New Jack
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IP: 736D B1B5
ok... i decided insteada droppin 1 long verse i'll post two shorter ones... i got 20 minutes to do this...
lets go Delirious dont wanna ruin ya expectations with the ex-situation, i'm just explainin,all the shit already thought of, but i'm just now sayin it...no longer stayin in thought i was down on my luck,but i'm just now regaining it couldn't get the picture till i started paintin it stainin it with a mixture of sweat,blood & tears- wit a lil bit of pain in it, never ever ever fakin things, gotta rever-rever-reverse things, wit a letter-etter i dont know if i ever want her ta see... but curiously... when i look though the delusions i see you just using my being a human being, between you and me, the using's gettin between you and me too misconstured for you to see, cuz if you miss this dude then you would see, that you should get on your two feet, before us two are both defeated, deleted, and if you think it's something you should save, for some strange reason you should stay, you should say it... cuz you just look delirious to me ================================================== ===== here's some more shit to the topic delirious.... i see & feel it, feelin ripped between this shit & what i'm really needin am i delirious cuz yall aren't seein what i'm thinkin, dont hear the screaming within, not lettin me be the real me supposed'a be this delinquant - jeans creased & stay-ing bent sick of they way people treat him - stuck wondering why they see that? uh huh, i'm just wonderin where the real street went where you could do ya thing without sinking in cement just... be who you're being, see things happening without people thinking you're delirious say things you mean without wondering what people r thinking to be able to have these dreams... without people thinking you're just dreaming well wake up, you people are the ones delirious... i'm the one that's not sleeping.
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07-25-04, 01:18 AM | #6 |
Flyweight
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IP: 456D 2E0B
alright this was an okay topical not bad at all
Im givin this one to flah though..... Imagery- I felt that flash took the imagery slightly more becuase his verse was more heart felt and eveything and it had a good story line going with it emotion- Again i felt that flash took the emotion becuase it was just a really good verse and some parts where intense and others where depressing so he deffintly took the emotion vocab- Flash takes this aswell because his vocab was more complex and anyone that cant see that needs to get glasses and get a brain... His words was more complex they was bigger and jus a better use of vocab complexity- This also goes to flash due to the fact that his vocab was complex along with his whole verse i really felt that this verse was a great piece Flow[b] Im saying this is a tie jus becuase flash cant get every catagory.. but seriously both had good flow [b]Structure- Its obvious that flash takes this becuase his lines was more even and just more put together flash takes this cuase he took virtually every catagory and his verse was more put together and alot of thought went into it it seems with akwordz it seems that he just did a search on google or something and copy and pasted it... not really good emotion or shit in it in my opnion
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"My intelligence begins where yours peaks at" ~Canibus |
07-25-04, 01:24 AM | #7 |
Flyweight
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IP: 456D 2E0B
what the fuck i spent all this time reading and then wrighting my vote just to find out i have to have 350 posts to vote.......Make this shit known next time hoes
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"My intelligence begins where yours peaks at" ~Canibus |
07-25-04, 06:53 AM | #8 | |
New Jack
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IP: 736D B1B5
well ummmmmmmmm .... now ya know... uppin
with akwordz it seems that he just did a search on google or something and copy and pasted it... riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight lmao...
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07-26-04, 09:13 PM | #9 | |
New Jack
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IP: 736D B1B5
anyone gonna vote on this? uppin
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...on Point... Get Off The Bandwagon.
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07-26-04, 09:42 PM | #10 | |
DaTrus Is A Bitch!
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IP: D52C 04A2
Check Dis..
Flash: 7/10 Nice Story Line....Kinda Played Most People Take This Direction With Topicals. Your Emotion Was Pretty Nice..Not Too Much Vocab But Word Usuage Was Aight. Not Many Metaphors or Multis But Your Structure and Flow Was Nice. Awkordz: 5/10 Would've Been Better If You Woulda Took A Direction With Your Topical Instead of It Seeing That You Wrote Line After Line Just Defining The Word. Um...Your Flow Was Good...Just Your Emotion and Creativity Needs Improvement. Vote - Flash ~R~ |
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07-28-04, 02:23 AM | #11 | |
New Jack
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IP: AAF1 A3DB
okkkkkkkkkkk.... I spat 2 differant verses with two examples of being delirious, you say that his topic was PLAYED and I need to improve MY creativity?
since when does Structure cancel out FLOW? when did STRUCTURE help you spit something on a beat? Since when did STRUCTURE help you establish a rhythm in your head? seems to me you're just mad that my girl exposed your crooked penis flappin, cyber sex havin ass....
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...on Point... Get Off The Bandwagon.
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07-28-04, 05:10 PM | #12 | |
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IP: C1DA C961
Better Structure and Flow_ flash
Vocab and usage_ a k w o r d z imagery_ close but flash complexity_ both emotion_ flash nice drop from both y'all and everything.. y'all both had y'all downfalls but nice overall.. stay up.. overall vote: flash keep doin' ya thing a k w o r d Z.. nice shit fa real ~wun~
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07-28-04, 05:59 PM | #13 | |
New Jack
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IP: AAF1 A3DB
why is it that 2 people my girl has/had known beef with are the only ones voting?
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...on Point... Get Off The Bandwagon.
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07-29-04, 09:39 AM | #14 |
Banned: Biting
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IP: 1C0F 1C11
i have no clue but upppin
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07-29-04, 09:56 AM | #15 | |||
...Belong...
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IP: CCAE A7E8
Aight my vote on this battle goes to..............flash.
Basically outta the two topicals...i was more drawn to his, he was more on point with the topic at hand and also managed to keep his structure clean, his verse flowed well and had sum really good wordplay i liked this verse a lot keep it up... A k: Ur verse was nice too but in my opinion, it just lacked that lil bit on flashes. It was good though dont get me wrong the structure was ok and the wordplay was good in places, just overall, i swayed over flashes side... V/flash RTF on ma sig
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