I revised my last rhyme and added a chorus so tell me wut u think.......I wrote this last week from the heart and it was a way to express some of my emotions
its called

Take a look inside

I lived my life in sin but my faith keeps me heaven bound,
Sometimes i look at life and wish i could turn it around
Nights alone when im reflecting, listening to my inner sound
then waking up at night, ready to fuckin pound
fuck u racist bitches, my anger is starting to mound
so here my warning to u , dont disrespect the middle east
no one heard me when im nice, so im releasing the beast
Im done giving advice to u bitches, i aint ur fuckin priest

So take a look inside my life and glance up at the skies
god keep me from all these evil sinner and their lies
fuck the drugs and alcohol, who need these crooked highes
maybe when ur confused like me......shit take a look in my eyes

Too much drama for me to handle, so im waving goodbye
All i wanna do is mind my own business and get fuckin high
no more covering up people's dirt, im ready to fly
so im spitting the real shit, this aint sum joke or lie
Im ready to fuck the world like its the american pie
Im an arabic soldier so I kno ur bitches are kinda scared
ive had niggas threating me before and i neva fuckin cared
I aint a lil kid anymore, my vision no longer imparied
im a grown ass man , eighteen years got me well prepared
I aint neva been accepted, people just judged so I stared
wishing for anyone to swing first, but no one fuckin dared

So take a look inside my life and glance up at the skies
god keep me from all these evils people and their lies
fuck the drugs and alcohol, who need these crooked highes
maybe when ur confused like me......shit take a look in my eyes

Haters called me a wansksta, a faker with no game or skill
cant u get bitches get it straight, this aint a fuckin drill
so listen up to me before i have my bois fuck up ur girll
then leave ur families guessing who throw u over that fuckin hill
My fuckin liscense is deadly with a label that reads "ready to kill"
So either step the fuck back or take a chill pill
Cause i got arabs who will fuck u up, we always stand still
U motherfuckers cant never move us, we just too damn ill

So take a look inside my life and glance up at the skies
god keep me from all these evils people and their lies
fuck the drugs and alcohol, who need these crooked highes
maybe when ur confused like me......shit take a look in my eyes


i mite be a rookie and ill admit im new to the game
but whoever fuckin said an arab cant get some rap fame
so this is for anyone who ever wanted to make a name
im puttin these haters to rest then im passin the flame
tired of hiding my race and being put to shame
cause dealing with this bullshit can drive anyone insane
so theres only one way to get shit off ur brain
pack urself a bowl and smoke good ol mary jane
shes the only girl who helps you get through ur daily pain
the suffering, the anger, the days of endless rain
the times when u thought life was worthless and there was nothin left to gain

So take a look inside my life and glance up at the skies
god keep me from all these evils people and their lies
fuck the drugs and alcohol, who need these crooked highes
maybe when ur confused like me......shit take a look in my eyes

So my message is real easy to understand, its quite simple and plain
work hard at what u want, dont let things go in vain
have ur fun while can, smoke herb but never touch cane
keep a couple of friends close and watch ur fuckin back
respect girls and treat them good, dont just holla and mack
so when this beat ends, dont be talking that fuckin smack
cause sooner or later, me and my boi aus gonna have jordan up on the map
represting all the sand niggers from toronto to the dirty napp (indy)
so get off my nuts already, cause thats a fuckin wrap

plz give me some of ur opinions or feedback....thanks alot

__________________
"You want to rap and you got no battle, it's like havin' a boat and you got no paddle" -- Public Enemy

"Mackin' is a game and everybody's playing it" -- Ice Cube

"I'm an addict for sneakers, 20's of buddah and bitches with beepers" -- NAS



The Ambitions of a Soulja

uppin for some feedback plz

__________________
"You want to rap and you got no battle, it's like havin' a boat and you got no paddle" -- Public Enemy

"Mackin' is a game and everybody's playing it" -- Ice Cube

"I'm an addict for sneakers, 20's of buddah and bitches with beepers" -- NAS



The Ambitions of a Soulja

that shit was ill. Your vocab on some of the rhymes coulda been betta.

Overall, would sound mad good as a song, Ya gonna try and put a beat to that?

I was gonna add the beat of the pastor troy song Vice Versa but i cant find that instrumental ....any recomendations...

uppin for more feedback....thanks alot man!

__________________
"You want to rap and you got no battle, it's like havin' a boat and you got no paddle" -- Public Enemy

"Mackin' is a game and everybody's playing it" -- Ice Cube

"I'm an addict for sneakers, 20's of buddah and bitches with beepers" -- NAS



The Ambitions of a Soulja

Uppin for some feedback plz

__________________
"You want to rap and you got no battle, it's like havin' a boat and you got no paddle" -- Public Enemy

"Mackin' is a game and everybody's playing it" -- Ice Cube

"I'm an addict for sneakers, 20's of buddah and bitches with beepers" -- NAS



The Ambitions of a Soulja

dis was ok....some nice flow and structure....needs work tho man..6/10

__________________

this was pretty good.
try to use better vocab.