Only time will tell, If this Mind will Prevail
If i'll sail to the Moon, Or be a Pack Rat in Hell
This 12 Gauge, Snug and Close, Provides Incomming Support
Just another Kid On the Ropes, Brought Into this world, Through a Sea Lift Port.
Who Could Stop me From Being me, Maybe you baby wit those Bleached Teeth.
With that Blonde hair, that sways through the air, Come sit wit me Bitch, Or get slapped ta shit, I was taught Not to care, Not a care in the world? No where.
Come On OVer, I'll Teach you one thing or two.
What gives you the Right to do what you do
I'll make you Read your own last rights, If yah know whats best for you
Take a seat, Son I dont pack heat, this Meat Cleaver works fine
when i decide to wine and dine, Keep this In Mind, Yah Life is Incased in this Tweleve Gage, Locked and Loaded ready to turn the page.
Fuck Structure, I'd Rather get Drunk and Go to Church
Fill this Sprit wit Vodka, Damn its Only to Quench My Thirst.
I'm a Dick I know, But so Is God For burning Down My Home,
Left with This Cardboard Box and Steryphone,
I use this Orange cone now as a Phone
I Am who I Am, Its All me, From the Feet to the Teeth
I'm so Real with every heart beat


Whatever Just Sitting at work.. And Keyed it up..

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I left fed on

http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=197487
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=197565

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yo homie i wa feeling everything perfect wordplay was off da hook,vocab was good,structure was nice!what else do i got to say this piece DOPE!
15/20
Good Piece ~1~ RTF inmy "Niggaz Doubting Me"Part II

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k.. B-Mac

urrr capable of better

im gonna be honest.. no hate at all

-- good idea of what to put... but not expressed well enough
-- work on structure, it was off
-- good metas
--
This 12 Gauge, Snug and Close, Provides Incomming Support

try to stay off the guns n drug topics .. its really overplayed.. u played it quite nicely though


overall 4/10 -- no hate man .. just keep elevatin

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OptimisticallyGenius

Word.. Thanks for the Feed... ....

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i say if drugs and guns is what yu know....go for it....yu cant write about what ya dont know....this was kew....i liked that 12 guage line.....and the one about the meat cleaver....seemed cocky.....hmm...work on ya stucture...some lines were stretched and others werent...if ya gonna go long....GO LONG....dont hesitate....thats how yu miss the ball and everyone gets mad....lol.....str8 drop

keep writing!!!

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..:: Artik In The Phlesh::..
.Re-Writing The Re-Run.

word.. Thx for the feed.. Yah i just wrote this up in 10 min at work.. Just Fuelded From Bordom.....

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