Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
04-24-05, 02:01 AM | #1 | |||||||
New to RV
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1st drop Looking for some honest feedback
IP: AE1A F0B8
Yo Its not hard for me to speak openly/
About how i dont want know one to notice me/ Because of all the dirt I did locally/ So I distance myself socially/ And lash out towards the people who are close to me/ And society wants me to shut up and kiss ass, because thats how your suppose to be/ But these acts of sin are all over me/ I yell to quit, but the grip keeps choking me/ And its hard to resist the persistence, of the devil who keeps poking me/ Im just sick of chalking up loses/ And being glared at like a freak, because Im following crosses/ An all the whispers are constant/ Behind my back about the fact that the blood my sins were bought with, was just my fantasy/But how can it be/ when nothing in my life has stopped or ever damaged me/ Look, sometimes Im a dick even when I dont try to be/ But its the devil on the right side of me/ who lies to me/who's constantly trying me/ Attacking my weaknesses, while bribing me---with riches/ which is/ sometimes more comical then seeing all the jocks from high school, all turned into little bitches/ But my flow is more disturbing then getting hexed by six eastwick witches/ And having visions, of me hanging myself in my girlfriends kitchen/ cause i could no longer handle the anger that fuelled my rage, like a high powered piston/ Sometimes the rhymes I write make no sense to me, like a homosexual christian/ sometimes i just want to get out of the grips of the fists that Im clinched in/ So I act up, and throw hysterical fits of canipshin/ And I never see the pain in which Im enflicting, upon myself/ whenever my life stability starts slipping/ And my folks start tripping/ And my girl starts bitchen/ About the fucked up decisions, of sins Im commiting/ Like my rhymes no good, because of all the cuss words that Im spitting/ And the details that Im skipping/ But the skills that Im kicken, get no props, Like a fat ugly girl stripping.............. Last edited by NarKotic : 04-24-05 at 02:08 AM. |
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04-24-05, 03:51 AM | #2 | ||||
leave you rest'n pz's
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IP: 0CC4 EFEF
WORK ON LEVELIN OUT YAS LINES.........
lose the ///////// its wack n not needed........ makes you look newbish in my opinion......... verse wasx hmmmmm average...... pz, stay up n keep cypherin.... . . . . . . my advice is to go to the cypher forum n pop off there cuz you aint on the level yet, keep at it n you will be, just keep praticing on the cyphers
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i'll play on ya consience, ya contents is complete nonsense
speak of biting, then you fucks flip everyone of my damn concepts what the fuck, was you high..? did you think i wouldn't recognize lines that i made then you come up some bullshit tryna prove that im gay...! . . fake fucks..move on...! |
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04-24-05, 11:04 AM | #3 | ||||
Peace, Love, Unity
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IP: AB23 98FF
For you first drop it was decent and same thing as DAZ said... Keep the whole ////// off the end of your lines because its pretty herbish.. it sounds like it would be good on audio though, and i like the multiples thrown in there... overall it was decent except the structure was fucked in the A....
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