I stand with feeling cold, hair stands up and shaking Ligaments
Vision spins and once again I see distorted Pigments
I feel nausea, dizzy as I fall to the Asphault
Get up and take Blow To The dome but I aint taking about Assault
Already tripping and about to take another One
Rip apart the pieces and put another green tablet to my Tongue
Mouth goes numb and feeling like I got Lead Lips
Falling on my face, lets just say Im on Head Trips
I got a Dead Grip, on these oxys and I aint Lettin Go
Holler back later when you see me next time at my Funeral
Take a hit of the green as smoke slowly fills the Room
Getting high as hell as you break up ya herbs and Shrooms
But it all comes to an end when you gain concienceness Again
Wake up with aching pains in the backyard of A Friends

Uppin for some detailed feedback

the breakdown ....

I stand with feeling cold, hair stands up and shaking Ligaments
Vision spins and once again I see distorted Pigments

nice multis wit ligaments and vision spins

I feel nausea, dizzy as I fall to the Asphault
Get up and take Blow To The dome but I aint taking about Assault

i like the idea to this line but the rhyme jus wasnt there

Already tripping and about to take another One
Rip apart the pieces and put another green tablet to my Tongue

niice niice.. kinda simple compared to the others, but it works

Mouth goes numb and feeling like I got Lead Lips
Falling on my face, lets just say Im on Head Trips

this one i like, sounds like the hook to the whole thing, good rhyme

I got a Dead Grip, on these oxys and I aint Lettin Go
Holler back later when you see me next time at my Funeral

i like this one two, nice multi to tie it in with tha last bar

Take a hit of the green as smoke slowly fills the Room
Getting high as hell as you break up ya herbs and Shrooms

pretty good, simple again, but good

But it all comes to an end when you gain concienceness Again
Wake up with aching pains in the backyard of A Friends

ok.. not so good, this was a pretty good rhyme but the ending was weak

overall - 6/10

return tha favor on any of my open mics. i got like 3-4.. peace1

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It was meant to be simple. The entire piece was imagery.

Anyway, Uppin

Hello mr climax

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