replied t gran thef and derileta

*poem is also on my web site along with others of mine*
replied to gran thef and dredful

*also posted on my personal web site*

Darkness approaches

Once more I turn to melancholy

Turning in on myself

A period of introspection

Full of doubts

How will I find the light to guide me?

So long in the darkness

Isolated and alone

Time passes by

One empty day after another

Should I end it all?

Is that the only answer?

What happens if I do nothing?

A slow decline

Into middle age and still further on

Dunno about this piece..

...has a certain amount of power than seems to come from a sad, downbeat overview (well kind of an overview...can't fidn rhe word for it funnily enough..)..

..also quite blunt at times, yet not toally disrupting the flow..

...i felt the ending was a bit too blunt though, maybe could've been better, it was in between like....

...and had other momens of 'iffiness' when it seemed to tail off...and usage of some vocab once or twice seemed a bit mis-placed..

..but overall, i likd it..

...respect..

uh it was coo...i really did'nt feel this piece much ma but I feel you got potential you just need a lil mo effort and work that's all keep doin ya thizzo tho
*~Holler atcha gurl~*

it sounded like a plea peice... you know a suicide letter or something... a poem should be more about the feelings and thoughts and description of the feelings... I duno if I'm making sense but yea keep ya head up girl OoNnEe