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View Poll Results: Who won this battle?
fgee 5 100.00%
Acidic 0 0%
Voters: 5. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
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Old 05-23-03, 11:47 PM   #1
Mad Man
Jee-You Knit?
 
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fgee (0-1) vs. Acidic (0-0)

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Check in's by Sunday
Verses by Tuesday
Voting ends Thursday

Topic...
Going down with the ship
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Old 05-24-03, 12:45 AM   #2
Acidic
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yo checkin in .................................................. ..................
.................................................. ...........................................
....................................
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keep lethal in thy beatin heart/
let thy tactix slip life falls apart/


vote on
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Old 05-24-03, 10:24 PM   #3
fgee
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CHECKIN IN THIS BATTLE AND I'M TYPING MORE WORDS BECAUSE AS U KNOW U HAVE TO HAVE 100 CHARACTERS TO REGISTER WHAT U SAY
 
Old 05-25-03, 12:11 AM   #4
Acidic
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yo im goin down with tha ship my fingertips r losin there grips, my mind is doin flips and tha boat is risin and im hangin upside down and im losin my chips//
dont kno how tha ship began to sink, but it might have been caused by tha whale tat passed us and gave us a wink//
shouldve prepared for tis but i wasnt thinkin straight, wonderin how many survivers gonna make it and see if there stories and mine r gonna relate//
tryin to keep myself from bein swept away in tha oceans current so im climbin up to tha top so i can be tha last to survive, got tha only memory of my love at home and tats tha only thing tats keepin me alive//
as i drift away wit only my life preserver keepin me from drowning, my heart slowly goes to a slow pounding due to tha water and tha cold surrounding//
comin close to death and i hear a voice whisperin in my head tellin me to hold on and not drift into tha eternal darkness, i open my eyes to see tha pitch black cape of darkness surroundin my whole body and fillin me up wit perpetual bliss//
i drift into tha open sea insearch of a rescue boat cuz im shiverin and turnin blue all tha way from my toes to my throat, on tha verge of hyperthermia i get rescued and im shiverin like im a chillian man trapped in an alskan cave wit only a hot towel round my legs and a round my arms and body i have a heated coat//

i did 7 bars match em
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Old 05-26-03, 12:20 PM   #5
fgee
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Setting.......Old days with big wooden ships and cannons......at war with the enemy......I'm captain of the 'Royal'

Nearing our fleet the ship chops through the waves gliding over Neptunes land
As the wind picked up the sails filled out sending us to make a stand
The horizon was like a canvas with brushes of smoke and cannon blasts drawing attention
Idle chatter died down and morphed into a solemn tension
War was about to enter our lives just a matter of time
I barked out orders to crew......some went below decks others began a mast climb
The sails became limp as they loosened slowing the ship down
And the smell of gun powder residue filled the air all around
The sea writhed with dead bodies and wood remnants
An unforeseen picture of the future events.........
Circling the battle sea i spotted the flag of out fleet on a seemingly empty ship
Wheeling the Royal i drew it along side........what happened next was a new script.............
Cannons roared into action and smoke blurred clear thinking
My ship rocked violently.....drilled with shots to the bow.....the Royal started ocean drinking
Deafening noises enveloped the scene with out-pause sparking confusion
The sister ships flag had simply been an illusion.............
Our cannons finally returned fire....with results unseen
A surprise attack began our destruction....ship downed by the 'queen'
Suddenly the deck slanted and lurched as the sea eyed our souls
Rapidly entering an eternal watery grave....becoming more dead sea scrolls
Bodies flung themselves over board in hope of escaping the ships swell
Water rising faster and faster.....i stood firmly on deck awaiting the depths of hell
All else faded from consciousness.....i saw the water posess the deck
And slowly but surely the cold hand of death reached for my leg
Higher and higher......i began to shiver from the deathly grasp
In honour of my crew i had to......go down with the ship till i let out my last gasp
 
Old 05-26-03, 02:21 PM   #6
fgee
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votessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss s
 
Old 05-26-03, 02:53 PM   #7
Mad Man
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Well, I was thinking about like a crew going down, like metaphorically going down with the ship, but whatever. I liked fgee's verse a lot more, the setting set it up for a good verse. Good Battle, vote fgee.
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Old 05-26-03, 07:37 PM   #8
fgee
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some more votes please.......this is only one of two battles with votability so far............................................... ..............................
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
 
Old 05-27-03, 04:16 AM   #9
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i think fgee took this..more imagery and it seemed on track a bit more....both were equally good though
 
Old 05-27-03, 07:42 AM   #10
DirtBoy69
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the breakdown here is pretty simple fgee got it. flow,volcab and the story was some of the best story telling i've read this week. keep up the good work both of you. anyother week acidic could of taken it but this week i vote for fgee
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Old 05-27-03, 01:35 PM   #11
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Old 05-28-03, 07:55 AM   #12
fgee
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Old 05-28-03, 01:51 PM   #13
fgee
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Old 05-28-03, 02:03 PM   #14
13th Disciple
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I Felt Fgees Way More Than Acidic.......He Nailed The Concept Of It WHile Acidic's Honestly Was A Little Bit Cheesy.....Thats Just My Opinion Not A Put Down So Lets Not Get It Twisted......Good Battle But Vote=Fgee....1
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Old 05-28-03, 07:31 PM   #15
Trip Marxx
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*The polls will not let me vote*

It shouldn't be obvious(but it is), who wins this? Fgee put in the creativity, flow, vocab, wordplay, etc, etc! Acidic...dude...your flow was straight fuckin me up....bars were long as hell! But your rhyme didn't nail it like fgee's did.....

Vote - fgee

*Peep my topical vs. Un-Skrypted*
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