Havent thought up a proper title yet...........so some suggestions wouldnt go astray just thought i temporarily call it from the heart ...................because it is...no hate because this is sorta abit about my grandmother....................................... ..............

They say by touching the terminally ill's hand it gives you the inner power,
But when my grandma was dying there wasnt anything i could offer to say to make her better, only a flower,
Becuse i dont need scizoprenia to tell me why i see ghouls,
Asking docterswhether there gunna make it or not they treat you like fools,
I aint a beliver because life is to full of defeats,
If there really was a god wouldnt he guide and care for his sheep,
Young or old it doesnt really matter when there life is ended,
No matter what psychatrists tell you some scars cant be mended,
Didnt belive she was dead until i saw her in a wooden box in her final resting place,
But the thing that made me so angry,as i seached amongst the mourners i couldnt see one tear on there face's,
But i guess to myself that there hardened by age,
A huge turning point in my life to them just another page,
I remeber the day i visited that terminally ill ward,i saw a small girls sitting on her granfathers knee, a fresh tear in her face,
Look around i can sorta tell why nobody ever visits this place,
It still makes me angry i hope they feel the inner guilt,
I never will foget the day i saw the coffin and that guy played the bagpipes in the kilt,

Needs a bit of work a bit small.................................but please only positive critism........................................... ..............thanks if you hit this up

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yeah flow is tight... nice dedication song.. had good meaning

thanks uppin 4 sum replies this only my second open mic

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this is good for ur second open mic..........i already told u the rest of the details in msn.........UPPING

uppin uppinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn upin

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upppin

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That was nice man...Deep shit, can't comaplin against that...On a Lyrical not, the only thing I can say is to up your multies to improve the flow...Well done...Good Drop...

..........Pz............

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"only positive criticism", i dont know how get away with placin at on tha end of your post, lol, no hate.....mad props,

Tha piece was hott, it was deep......so it could throw sum kats off, flow was good, rhyme scheme could have been betta, i lyked it becuz it was full of emotion.........make those corrections and this ish will blow up,

stay real, peace, 1 luv

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"I'm stuck with...what i'm Stuck Wit, cause i don't Suck Dick" - Jadakiss

Yeah i need to even out the lines and shit but shit and then it ll be better............................................ ...uppin

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uppin................................

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deep deep deep deep.............good, I liked it.......UPPIN!!!

uppin this shit come onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

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Whats the point of living?

The voices in my head Feat. Rule

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More Comming soon!