I'm packing tha bags and leaving faster than flash/
reing back with some cash cause I keep taxing tha stash/
half and I'm smashed... seeing spots and phantasms/
till I can't even rap cause I stop and laugh at em'/
I'm not that bad, am I? you think I need rehab?
kissing my weedplants bye and telling em' that I'll be back/
right after my relapse... at tha bar with ah shot of cuervo/
cause there's not one seed in my sack, but I'm far from sterile/
talking to this wierd girl and I think she was feeling me/
but really her hands were in my jeans stealing my weed/
knew I had tah deal with this thief so I kicked out her seat/
she hit tha ledge, I gripped her head and ripped out her weave/
then I found myself sound asleep laying down on tha beach/
lounging in tha heat with ah blunt hanging out of my teeth/
tha waves pounded tha sea, drowning tha shouts and screams/
got up from tha ground... and I was surrounded by police/
so now I'm getting clowned by these two bitch ass detectives/
that didn't have evidence and wouldn't quit asking questions/
it lasted ten seconds then I walked off, flipped em' bird/
said this is absurd, I don't talk tah cops then tripped on tha curb/
cause my vision was blured from all tha mace and pepper spray/
tha fall drained my energy... so I stayed tah meditate/
prayed for ah better day, asking god if it was fate or destiny/
that my face bent this way tah see tha dog shit laying next tah me/
raised eventually... and made my way along this endless street/
stopped and bought some hennesy on MLK and seasame/
drank heavily till it was empty and tossed it south/
then I see oscar tha grouch about ah block from my house/
he started talking real loud and tried tah knock me out/
so I got him on tha ground and put tha glock in his mouth/
damn my night's are wild... I had tah kill ah fucking muppet/
but I guess it's just lifestyle's of tha drunk and blunted...

oooohh!

sad...funny...yet so true... I liked this piece... it made me laugh a coupla timez... cause I've been through the same shit...lol...plus I see you had a coupla good muliez up in there...nice drop son...keep doin' ya thing...holla...

Rhyming/Flow
Wow, THis Shit Was Blazin! The Flow Was Smooth Throught, You had Mad Rhymin' And Multi's. You Bars We're The Same Length As Well, Somthing You Don't See Too Often Now.....8/10

Vocab/Wordplay
Worpdlay Was Killa, The Vocab Was Ill, But It COuld've Been A Bit Better, But Still It Didn't Affect The verse In ANyway.... 7/10

Concept/Topic
LOved It..Can't Say I've Been In That Position Myself..lol, Deep,Funny, But You kept It Real..Nice Mixture Of Emotions. You Tight At StoryTelling, Keep That Up....8/10

Overall
8/10, Can't Say Much more To Improve it Really, It Was Tight...Keep It Up

Word!

normally i woulnt like shit like this based on the title and topic but u did this shit real well..flow was near perfect...like how u ended it...wording was on point pretty much throughout the whole thing...dog shit line was funny...overall,an above average piece

That was a pretty good drop........keep it up............

I THOUGHT IT WAS A GREAT READ NOTHING I WOULD CHANGE THE DISPLAY OF TALENT HERE WILL MAKE YOU FLY UP THE RANKS QUICK I LOOK FORWARD TO READING MORE

aight this shit was on point kid i mean the flow couldn't have gotten any better the way you rhymed was hot as hell the topic stayed the same and you kept the shit goin and goin and to make the shit better i loved how you got the title of the piece in at the end keep doin your thing kid

__________________
shut the fuck up

even if i stutter i'll still sh-sh-shit on you/ pun

dead in middle of little of little italy
little did we know that we riddle
some middle man who didn't do ditally/ pun

respect...
appriciate tha feedback... it means the world to me...

peace...

this is an original style, although sometimes it seemed to wrote down anything that rhymed in order to make a multi, it sounded pretty good, the imagry was thebest part of this, well worth the read.