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Old 10-17-03, 07:53 PM   #1
Da NFamous
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Wifey

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i step in the buretta tethered metal door let my mental forget the core~
of my mind heart and soul bet that intelligence is a long forggoten and weathered door~
entered by only kingly don bishops king me the rhyme's richest~
most pure and cash filled pockets of gashes killed by rockets of dime bitches~
rewind my mental loop i'll dent a fruit uncomfortabbly treading on hell with a bended boot~
offend the continent sonstant-ly stompin on this plank of reality only sweet wit a rented tooth~
send medly melodies travel thru bass breaks and rape and erase my fate state~
all because of my little half puerto rican mami calm me down to see her great face~
let her soul of gold corrode the g in me never more i'll roll wit hoes and hold my D~
forget my mind and my heart was once parts now parted departing i flow and beat~
let go defeat holdin baby girl its all gravy shady babies wadin in this unholy world~
phony homies speak flowing dub oh are dees (w-o-r-ds) two my adoringly only girl~
purplex my heart with her mystique complex as a sheet of white paper wifed a nature's mother~
oh brother let me stutter the mushy cluttered wick wickedy weakness now and later butter~
hold the pourin beat of her heart drip let my heart rip apart if she did a enemy coward whole heartedly~
regarding me im a FUCKIN killer i'll kill her if she doesn't spare my emotions and spar with bars sparringly~
forgive my sidetrack wax melts on her figurely curves my (ahem) rises like curbs~
disturb my lack of peace with waxing d-r-i-ps perturbed by my anger flying like birds~
shorty hit a nigga in my dirty crew, as i take a thirty two to my former homeboy steady embedding strays~
my target sharp and heartless pin point the largest problem..this all on my wedding day~
1luv.
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Old 10-17-03, 10:44 PM   #2
Da NFamous
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comon, please, 1luv.
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Old 10-18-03, 01:28 AM   #3
*Y_nOt*
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"regarding me im a FUCKIN killer i'll kill her if she doesn't spare my emotions and spar with bars sparringly~
forgive my sidetrack wax melts on her figurely curves my (ahem) rises like curbs~
disturb my lack of peace with waxing d-r-i-ps perturbed by my anger flying like birds~
shorty hit a nigga in my dirty crew, as i take a thirty two to my former homeboy steady embedding strays~
my target sharp and heartless pin point the largest problem..this all on my wedding day~"Da' NFamous


^^^^That shit right their was pretty hot. Your "poerty" is more like a verse you'de write for a song tho, wich is koo wit me. You put alot of thought and emotion into this and you can tell. Your topic was tiight....had kind of a story line to it. A nice drop come'on from you 4real, was well worth the peep. Keep it up and keep reppin N.Y.C to the fullest!!! Be easy, 1
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"Speak the truth before God. We know this man is a sinner."
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"All I know is this...Once I was blind and now I can see"
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Old 10-18-03, 10:27 PM   #4
Da NFamous
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Many thanks Y it means alot, both the feed and the poem, elevation is key, 1luv.
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Old 10-18-03, 11:12 PM   #5
Dimez
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Quite A Long Piece!
I Didnt Get Some Parts Cuz I Tend To Be A Lazy Reader,
But The Vibe I Get From This Poem Is Good

Quote:
send medly melodies travel thru bass breaks and rape and erase my fate state~
all because of my little half puerto rican mami calm me down to see her great face~

^^^^ Damn Those Ricans LOL

Well Good Stuff And Keep It Commin!

~LadyD!~
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Old 10-19-03, 10:39 AM   #6
LM
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Pretty much what Lady D said applies to me. A long peice which made me switch off now and again but what I caught of it was pretty good
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Old 10-19-03, 09:06 PM   #7
Da NFamous
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^Well thanks at least for ur honesty u two, elevation is key, 1luv.
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Old 10-20-03, 09:16 PM   #8
Da NFamous
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dot dot dot elevation is key dot dot dot, 1luv.
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Old 10-21-03, 08:46 AM   #9
Edicius
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This was kinda like allready refferd, a open mic, with a poetic twist, in my eyes, ...but also a bit stretched in my opnion , butu used as ok vocab, ....and a nice flow in it, ...so that kept it ok...
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