*A pencil is heard scratching on paper.. then words are erased..*

Dear Mom and Dad:

Ya'll are doing well I see, branched to form another family
A year after the tragedy everybodies forgiven M and D
Mom, you got a new man, understand, that I still Love You
He's a good guy, but believe he's gone if he ever touch you
Dad, you got a great woman, and though she seems controllin
It's plesant to see you presently in love and it's showin
I'm growin, older and look at me now, Ya boy's doing this rap shit
I told you it was more than a habit, it helped me get over the bad shit
Cause a year ago, I was lookin for any type of answer quick
So I turned to drugs and took no hugs and burned cancer sticks
Chances it proposed, I was high, eyes closed, forgot about pain
See you with new people, but I still only scream Mommy and Daddy's name
You sent to me to a Counselor, who acted like he cared
I just sat and stared, two visits and I was fuckin sick of bein there
I only wanted to talk to my brother, he helped me through the split
Shit, he was there like no other, everybody else was scared like a bitch
Although it's been a year, and I've practically gotten over it
I would actually like to know Why?, I still don't get the just of it
I've put it behind me now, and over time I've come to find
That i've looked for words to say, when the only thing right to say is mine
Only thing I might say that makes sense as I get tense comes from Mind
Many people were kind, but I looked for my own solutions, my ass was blind
Parents splitting causes an Educational Pollution, try to win, only losing
Grades slipped, my mind on showing and proving
That I could end the ruin and turn things great with one solution
But it didn't work, and after a year, ya'll still apart, but ya happy
Still look out for me, Haircuts when I'm nappy, medicine when I'm feelin crappy
One more question..
Why did ya'll laugh when I said my drafts were leading me to Rap stardom
The least I expected was a bit of support from the court of mother and father
Writing was my obsession that led me through the depression
Guessin you learned a lesson, don't doubt me with any questions
Cause now you've seen me grow from seed to baby boy to teenage man
Haha, Mommy I still remember when you first read me Green Eggs and Ham
I love you, and Daddy, I love you too, despite the lack of connection
I reckon shit can only get better, but Im still gonna use Pen and Paper for protection
So after a year of ya'll not bein together, I've finally found my smile
It's been awhile since it cracked, but fact is when I pick up the phone N dial
And hear either one of ya'll on the other end sayin I Love You Travis
Ya boy smiles

Love, Travis

**Travis is me, the piece is about the past year of my life, my parents spliting. Thanks in advance for feedback.**

MY REPLIES:

A.T. Feat. DAO- Remember Me
/:Ayura:\- Mind
Bigg E Z- Under Dogs Rebellion


-Formula.

damn man...its nice that u done the effort....but i only came on to check my e mails......

ill put this in faveroutes so i can give feedback later... thanx for the feedback on mine tho....

ill holla as soon as i get time blud...peace

pretty good piece man
the flow seemed really natural in this....the vocab was basic but when u write emotions out on paper they dont arrive in multisyllable words
it was a personal kinda topic obviously.gave the reader insight into your struggles n what not
i liked the way you ended it..the stuff about cracking a smile
not bad at all...
props
and peep mine please

I assumed there was alot of emotion. .you didn't really write it though. .na'mean. .there was no imagery, very very basic vocab. .UP that. .Flow was the only thing i thought was good. .Apart from the fact that this meant alot too you. .

Pz

Thanks for the input man. Lemme clarify somethin tho.. About the emotion.. some was there.. but this was kinda like a Reflection piece.. nawmean? Like there is emotion.. but most has been erased b/c it's been a year. Now if I had written this a year ago.. then you would expect alotta emotion. Thanks for the feedback tho.

-Formula.

Hey.. Could Anybody tell me why I'm posting under my old username? I had to log in again, and now i'm under my old one... This is Formula.. anybody help me?

Uppin.

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yo fomula dats was nyce i like rhymes dat tell ya wat shit u hav gone thou man i was adopted i have heeps ov shit telling peepz bout da shit i hav done aiight nyce shit dawg Peace (v)

That shit was ill yo. I know what you was talkin about with the emotion not really comin out. I feel you on this topic straight up. Keep droppin

Up.

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