Yo!
iam sittin in my cell chewin on my pen cap//mind brewin up a new rap//many thoughts of frustration///wishin i was able to hit da bus station//an get a ticket for a one-way trip back to my hood// heard niggaz wannna clap me//but fuck its all good// peoples say iam wrong for what it is dat iama do to'em//have they ass in da icu//food being feed througha tube to'em//the resperator the only reason he still breathing// cuz the shells still lodged inside gott'em gaspin& weezin//gotta his mamma by the bedside beggin & pleadin//to GOD,please dont take her baby she needs'em//u can call me cold-hearted or just flat out evil//cross-me,i'll put holes in ur carcase rite along wit ur people//to badd life aint a movie bitch,there aint no sequal//dats it,once u dead u gone time for ur maker to met you//an as for ur people alive//i raised my price//damn right iama beat'em for the rest of their lives//cuz aint no nigga gettin money in my hood//i c a nigga in da gettin money,thinkin he hott shit//i found how much he buyin an excatly where he gott it//then i jooks his supplier for all of the product//look at me//what u see?// a gangsta//a mobster//represent Street Product til' i D.I.E.//we terroizing tha streets like monsters//
-Supreme Da Ghost-
holla at me i got it all day---------

Ehh.. needs Work. Dont
Get Me Wrong, You Got Potential..But
Take Theses Categories And Work On Them Emensly

Structure
............................................./
............................................./

Like That Not Like

.............../............../...................../
...../......../

Blah

Multies
Wordplay
Metaphores
Solid Punches

good lookin fizzle my nizzle words takin well in heed
-100-
-Supreme Da Ghost-

i agree i see potential, but ya rhymin needs alot of work.......i aint gonna go and babble on bout the normal shit, jus keep practicing...aight....pc

good lookin i appreciate it da replies
-100-
-Supreme Da Ghost-