RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > Textual Releases
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 11-20-03, 03:12 PM   #1
pot1ent
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
[Chaser]

IP: 3341 3037

I'm a low life,
In a low life,
That holds tight
Right before the moment
Set on rising like i'm potent
But soon i've got to lay down
Anxiety of whether im coping
Impiety of the fade grounds
Stays around
Like plastic
I found it drastic
When I had to catch it
Didn't even know what IT was
Yet I thought I had tac-tics
but didn't. .
Only why I got a drip because
I was
Flipping pills looking like tic-tacs
But just sits back
As my lip drags
Down to the ground
I can't even stick fags
Into my mouth
As my eyes twist tags
That stick out
Like bones piercing the skin
Girls appearing so slim
While looking for a girl called Anna
Cuz Anna-wrecked-this
While hammered like nails
My grammers reckless
I stammer in the night frail
Like broken threads
Now i've a awoken dead
Staring at my drunk night
With slumps as my hype
Plumped lights
Seemed more fat than Rick Waller
Reminisicing
As I flipped my chipped dollars
I'm them thats listening
So speak up
While i'm in this bleak rut
Too keep plucked chickens
To do as I was persisting
Now Annas got this fairys wishings
Hopefully now shes rarely stripping
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-03, 04:01 PM   #2
rule
..Soft Focus..
 
rule's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,639
Joined: Jun 2003
From: Ont.
Status: Offline
Text Record: 21-12
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1B3B C284

this was a good read, i found your flow went on and off but it was still worded well with multies and metas good read and nice style of written keep it up pz
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-21-03, 12:56 PM   #3
pot1ent
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: B0D9 CF17

. . .
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-26-03, 02:10 PM   #4
pot1ent
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 96EB 9617

Even though it was nice to read cuz after not seeing this piece or getting feedback for like a week or w/e. .I have found that new depth while writing, wording wise, flow wise, metaphorically, w/p, almost everything, but still drop feedback, I will reply to your, just name it
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:37 PM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.