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01-19-04, 08:17 PM | #1 | ||||
Word.
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Corrupted Visions: I'm Sorry
IP: DD10 0DFF
Look…I’m sorry for everything I did…I know I messed things up between us…but don’t let it stand in our way…Listen…
I’m Sorry…Nothing can explain how I just feel right now… It seems your out of my sight now with what I write down… Cause truth speaks through my words that I did not see… Everything you said got me…felt like someone shot me… Then I bursted out in anger, hurting you more than before… I didn’t see that…but you left and just slammed the door… I’ll admit that I broke down….and I… I just started crying… Cause I just thought I lost you….cause my heart is dying… I pounded the floor with my fist as tears went down my cheeks… Knowing that I lost you forever and these frowns I keep… Hurting you I didn’t mean it, Im sorry… The pain I caused I didn’t see it, Im sorry… Hurting you I didn’t mean it, Im sorry… The pain I caused I didn’t see it, Im sorry… I’m Sorry…Nothing can take back what I said that day… Probably lost you forever but I don’t wanna head that way… Cause I love you so much and nothing will ever change it… When I cry my eyes rain it…but just all of this pain fits… Cause the things I said I didn’t mean, They were not true… But my words were like acid to your heart, they rot through… And seeing your eyes swell up with tears just hurt me… Cause I knew how much your love was, I wasn’t worthy… Eyes got blurry, I couldn’t see you leave but I heard you.. Didn’t mean to hurt you..but girl I know we can work through… Hurting you I didn’t mean it, Im sorry… The pain I caused I didn’t see it, Im sorry… Hurting you I didn’t mean it, Im sorry… The pain I caused I didn’t see it, Im sorry… I’m Sorry…Nothing can take back the mistakes I made… I honestly need you here, but all of this fate just fades… Cause even a lover makes a mistake sometimes though… You said every heart you lost but you won mine though… Doesn’t that mean anything to you anymore? I guess not… Now I just fill with so much pain that my chest rots… I have a broken heart all because of the mistakes I did… Now I close my eyes as tears flow out from my eyelids… Its times like these that I wish you would take me back… I just want to say that I’m sorry…and I really mean that… |
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01-19-04, 08:28 PM | #2 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: 6E79 CC5A
yea this was nice C. man I think ya used your topic well in this and it was very Good....Ya Structure is Good in this Like it always Is.....ya Flow was the Strong Point in this i think....Ya Have really good Multis IN this some are very Differcult man...so this was really Good and One Of Ya best i think Very Good Work Man....PeacE....
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01-19-04, 09:06 PM | #3 | |||||||
Here's Lookin At You Kid
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IP: 3D67 C959
yo i liked this piece.....very expressive....and good painting a picture for your reader, you stayed on topic nicely....vocab was solid...so was strucutre....and your wordplay i liked alot....nice as piece...good job c keep that shit comin......
9/10 peace check out open mic - Heres Something For Your Intrigue
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01-20-04, 08:52 AM | #4 | ||||
Banned: Spamming
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IP: 4577 CD9A
..Another dope piece..what else to expect from you..as aways it is true enjoyement reading your piece..but I must say..you are turning into a softy~~~LMAO~~~
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01-22-04, 03:46 PM | #5 | ||||
Word.
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IP: CE7F 70EF
Hey Thanks For The Feedback So Far, Keep The Feedback Coming In, Its Much Appreicated, Thanks.
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01-22-04, 04:29 PM | #6 | ||||
Over Weight
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IP: C1DA C961
Wow..I'm might have to use this on my ex..
Nicely done..flow and all..verbally.. Concept..a little ehh but still..i liked how u hit it.. Though..at times i lost the flow..but it came back.. Now much else to say.. please go peep my latest o.m..In the shoes of..
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Soft Focus Suicide Inc. RhymeVantage Def.Ill Ghost-Writers Retarded people's heads are to big..I'll be back with something just as funny as watching the Special Olympics..don't worry..
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01-23-04, 11:49 PM | #7 | ||||
Word.
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IP: DD10 0DFF
Hey Thanks For The Feedback So Far, Keep The Feedback Coming In, Its Much Appreciated, Thanks.
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01-23-04, 11:55 PM | #8 | ||||||
Guest
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Awesome
IP: 32D9 0BD3
That was a touching peace. Good flow and wordchoice. Keep up the good work!............................................. ..............................
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01-24-04, 12:23 AM | #9 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: EED2 4F8F
that was tight, it seemed more like R+B...but still tight....i liked the line...
"Cause the things I said I didn’t mean, They were not true… But my words were like acid to your heart, they rot through… And seeing your eyes swell up with tears just hurt me… Cause I knew how much your love was, I wasn’t worthy…" that line was touching....keep spittin'...peace
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Knowledge Is King |
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01-27-04, 03:17 AM | #10 | ||||
Word.
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IP: DD10 0DFF
Upping For More Feedback
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