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Old 08-07-08, 05:41 AM   #1
In-Vision
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Text Record: 22-1
Hip Hop Keystyle

IP: AA7B EBA8

I sit here and stare blankly at loose leafs..
construing on moves proven to use grief..
tools speak, beaten untill bruised deep..
presumed free, but trapped in words that move through me..
my shoes see, nothing but the dust i kick up..
lips stuck, am i mixed up? or just fixed on the clips that skip us..
strip rust, from the grip i've slipped from..
hit drums, untill shits numb, and theres nothing but clipped tongues..
spit some, blood exits through ripped gums..
hips hum, as they grind on the rails of wits slums..
sip rum, untill the concience is slowly found..
scolding crowns..whos kings boldy try to hold me down..
i'm lonely now, patroling the holes in holy ground..
and he showed me how..to move foward to the future..
fuse words, few've learned how not to abuse her..



little keystyle i did out of boredom..enjoy.
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post3226410
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Last edited by In-Vision : 08-07-08 at 06:20 AM.
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Old 08-09-08, 02:53 PM   #2
LPMNDCTE
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IP: C5F9 BA42

this key was done pretty nice. Depending on the amount of time that you spent on the key really reflects you ability as a writer to be able to buckle down and use vocab in a very creative way. The flow was well maintained and you had a good rhyme schema in this drop.
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Old 08-11-08, 12:00 PM   #3
SUPERVILLAIN
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nice drop big vish.

this piece is a little bit simpler than your typical work(s), but it's still pretty effective and clean as hell. i found a couple of misspelled words and the structure is a little uneven (please don't hit me! lol), but for a quick keystyle...it's still above o.m. par my friend. good job. keep 'em coming playboy.


s.v.
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