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Old 06-25-07, 09:12 PM   #1
Elusive
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The Cutting Edge

IP: 8CC1 3602

Dedicated to a true Story:
I love you and miss you Kayla...




"The Cutting Edge"

Slowly cutting her pain away, As she cuts her life away;
Forgetting those who love her and slowly passes her pain
Cuts herself for every little mistake she does, as she hates her
And as she can see what she's become, the reflection of the razor
Where've you gone my Love? You've faded slowly, i'm sorry i didn't say bye
I barely could've sawl you for the last time, Nor could i cry
I've loved you from hello, I was addicted to your voice, and your laughter
And my only motivation to wake up, was my reasoning for you to go after
I miss you, your we're my first love, but you went through to much love
And as every thing that didn't go right, you slit your arms, and left me above
A best friend to many, and my love, and little things that she hated
As the sorrowly days go by dreadfully..As she was always appreciated
She slowly cuts her wrists, and doesn't know it, but keeps Cutting
As she thinks she can change the Present, from the future to something

Slit..
Slit...
Drip..
Drip..

She drops the blade, and calls me, and crying sobing, and writes a letter
she states she's sorry for everything, and makes me promise to not forget her
I cry, while she falls, and drops her phone, and is knocked out..
As i panic, but i can't move, and words cannot come out my mouth..
Tears slowly drip from my face upon, and my tears turn into her blood
And as her blood drips from her wings, and she flys up above
As i cry all night and day, till this day, wishing that was my life sacrificed
Because blood & eternal happiness of love, can never have a price...

Slit..
Slit..
Slit..
Drip..
Drip..
Drip..



R.I.P Kayla..I'll see you soon..
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Old 06-25-07, 09:12 PM   #2
Elusive
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Last edited by Elusive : 06-25-07 at 09:18 PM.
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Old 06-25-07, 09:18 PM   #3
Elusive
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Alright,
Please leave feed, this is an topical, so idunno if some of you would get this.

Bump
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Old 06-25-07, 09:57 PM   #4
KM
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real deep....i like this......i dont do much topicals.....i still thought this was very good though.....keep writing ~1~
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Old 06-25-07, 11:16 PM   #5
Elusive
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Woot!
HOF?
I think so, rofl jk.
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Old 06-26-07, 02:53 PM   #6
Valiant
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deep...mayne...
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Old 06-26-07, 06:55 PM   #7
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Thnx,
If there was a topical forum on here, i would murder.
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Old 07-01-07, 05:43 PM   #8
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..Mhm...
.....
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Old 07-02-07, 04:15 PM   #9
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dang eerie stuff man. dat pic got me. but this stuff is killer mang. i like dis post alot. the storytellin and the feelin just flowed out. keep it up homboi
peace
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Old 07-19-07, 03:40 PM   #10
O//^\\EGA
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ok ok concept overall was deep..... good visual here...... the cuttin and drippin had a lil effect.... made me bite my lip a lil like ouch

structure was decent, flow stretched but i took it as a poem instead to get rid of the flow ish ....... couple fo metas in there, simple.... somewhat , for the most part everything was put together, pretty sad story esp since its true, if theres anyone that knows about loss its u and i feel u since ive been there.......keep doin u man.... good piece..... ill rate it as a poem and give it a thumbs up man....
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Old 07-29-07, 03:56 AM   #11
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this was real deep...i feel you
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