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12-24-03, 10:23 PM | #1 | ||||||
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[ I n S i D e ]
IP: 66BE 210B
I see you as more than a friend, even though I keep it within.
Heart stops, one word from you and it starts beating again. Now becoming inhabitants at the mere sound of your voice. You've got me smiling like a child that's surrounded by toys. I swear nigga, my soul doesn't reflect the blue skies you see. I hate to see you cry, but I just love it when you cry for me. Kept it inside of me, ya not my man, it's not worthwhile liven. Yeah it's a man's world, but it ain't nothing without woman. Thought of you, sudden rush, true love, far from a crush. You're a nigga that I hate because I love so much. 'Royal Blue |
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12-25-03, 08:46 PM | #2 | ||||||
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IP: D5D5 718A
Well....... If I may ask a question? Was this about somebody or were you just flowin from the top??
Anywho this was just for who ever you wrote it for can't be for anybody else. It's a little dry but sometimes poetry seems that way to others when they don't know. So all in all it was okay but needs more creativity. keep doin what ya doin 1 |
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12-25-03, 09:08 PM | #3 | ||||||
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IP: 66BE 210B
thanks..yeh is about someone else.. someone who has me by a string and if he hurts me, it doesnt matter.. ill take him right back.. yeh.. later
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12-25-03, 09:10 PM | #4 | ||||||
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IP: D5D5 718A
aww that is too sweet lol!
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12-25-03, 11:42 PM | #5 | |||||||
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IP: DEA2 944C
I KNO THE FEELIN I DEF CAN RELATE TO THIS SHIT..short and simple but sweet sweet i loved only vice i can give is if u tryna elevate u could work on poetic qualities NICE PIECE THO..keep it up..
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my head is clouded with senseless doubt but this seems to be my only escape route so ill slither my way across the ground to avoid my blyndedsoul from being found ~*~YOU LIVE YOU LEARN~*~ |
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12-25-03, 11:45 PM | #6 | |||||||
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IP: DEA2 944C
o and i see where phantasia is comin from where its only for the person u wrote it for but i dont neccessarily agree that was a nice piece.. and it had some deep lines
"Thought of you, sudden rush, true love, far from a crush. You're a nigga that I hate because I love so much." NICE TOUCH............ much respect
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my head is clouded with senseless doubt but this seems to be my only escape route so ill slither my way across the ground to avoid my blyndedsoul from being found ~*~YOU LIVE YOU LEARN~*~ |
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