Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
04-02-03, 06:46 AM | #1 | |||||||
Retired.
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Suggestions to improve
IP: A428 8FD7
This time your all gonna see a slightly different side of me
Not the one who’ll off your crew but the one who flows eloquently See taking you in this battle is like saying the Cubs will win the series And we got a better shot and Tyson explaining quantum theories Instead of targeting your mom I’ll leave you in a ‘House of Pain’ Then ‘Jump Around’ and stomp your flesh til you succomb to ‘Everlast’ing rain Verbally, you pack as much punch as a secong rate Teller Cept this is real magic dog til you see the end like Ol’ Yeller Thats right, I just hit you some wordplay and ‘Lord Willin’ I’ll soon overshadow, E’clipse’ you and then the next in line I’ll be killin Now’s your time to pull out your lil pen and notebook But you may as well not bother cause you know that your shook Aight dog, I’m out like Biggie playin dodge ball So remember the new me is out to off all ya’ll |
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04-02-03, 08:59 PM | #2 | ||||
Dope Beats . . . period.
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IP: CFB3 F800
not bad . . .
there is really no particular thing really wrong with it that I would tell you to fix, just keep at it, writing every day, and you'll get better with time . . . good luck . . .
__________________
The Soul Purpose LP . . . Summer '04 |
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04-02-03, 09:02 PM | #3 | |||||||
Retired.
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IP: 9F91 F985
thanks.. man
one a side note thanks for voting on everyone's shit we need more peeps like that |
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04-03-03, 05:12 AM | #4 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: A435 C624
I wouldn't say theres anything wrong with it, your not that bad.....
We gotta battle sometime Chrit.... |
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04-03-03, 08:54 AM | #5 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: 4E97 C1A7
that was alright. biggie line was prolly best though
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