Coming on

In a glad mood while you all a sad groove for hip hop
Because you slip a lot at microphones best to rip shop
On cats with strong stats stuff infect like bacteria yall
Best protect your posterior because this is a superior call
Out, as cats crawl about begging me to stop I tear down walls
As clowns fall like Humpty Dumpty a bunch of egg heads in stalls
My facts are ill no lack of skills yall on crack pills saying
I don’t make sense just because you’re fake and dense praying
For rhymes, just some sad rabbits with bad habits so have some carrots
These scrubs funny and bugs bunny love yall, you cluck like dumb parrots
Some cats silence a brute after a violent dispute over drug money
Slug a dummy with a glock then eat crummy ham hocks some funny
Shit dawg, to fuss is unclean must discuss ways and means to get paid
End up in a political controversy critical like a nursery crazy nitwit
But I don’t baby sit don’t change diapers in strange ciphers misfits
On their own will, like a married man on arid land can’t play around
Have to stay down watch my back, master in a continuous way
After a strenuous day almost carjacked had to use a tremendous AK
A horrendous display of fire power now my empire tower like federal
Buildings

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mylink (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=210364)

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Yesterday, 09:58 PM #3
gladbag
New to RV


Posts: 7
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my link (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=210364)

gladbag
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Yesterday, 10:21 PM #4
.Lola Cruez. II
Leave me alone.I'm sleep!




Posts: 1,973
Joined: May 2005
Status: Offline
IP: 56B1 4C65


Good Lil verse here you have here...I liked the flow and you need to stop putting captialization in each line..Do it like this

Agljdagl;kjdag;lkfj;agd,
adgjkl;d;agkljd gj;ljdsg.

Got it?..The flow is kinda choppy in some-places but that's alright. I'm liking the lil wordplays you have here..some are force so try to be relax and just let your idea's flow, I'm digging the Metaphors too, so keep that Up..

Keep writing peace.
__________________

-In the Lab.....






....Rehabilitating Myself-



"Open Mics"
Your Time is Up.

Closed Eye's

it waz tight
i rate it a 8/10
best line
Best protect your posterior because this is a superior call
Out, as cats crawl about begging me to stop I tear down walls
As clowns fall like Humpty Dumpty a bunch of egg heads in stalls

__________________
tay in this bitch shoot 2 kill :shoot