This got slept on for a while, and I wanted to know straight up if this shit wack or if its got potential. check this.

Verse 1
Kids cryin and suicide for these poor souls,
Christmas is nearin and kids be fearin more coals,
Children doin drug runs too the *four holes* ,
Drive around tryin too survive this dreary place,
Dead visions of bitches in prison that I nearly face,
Feel disgraced facin death this home a yearly waste,
Fiends demeanin our dreams cause they smoke more,
Crack is for faggets or retarded kids aint folklore,
Out the window see a kid payin the coc whore,
This shit is scary and its makin me very sick,
Attend my dads funeral in these clothes im barely fit,
Its the life of a man that even satan would rarely pick,

*HooK*
Im so sorry, I couldnt bring you too fame and glory,
If I could do it this would be another painless story,
But this home could make a man go insane,
Ill soon be outta here with no more pain,

Verse 2
Days go by slowly, If ya know me just know that Im lonely,
Bitches tryna blow me, I can tell right away this ho's phonie,
Accept change and spare food but nothin from ho's only,
And its so sad, everything we once had is sold or broken,
Brotha's cant even get high, homie thats mold your smokin,
I dont wanna die, But my battle wound holes are open,
And I'm hopin that these kids awoken with Nice dreams,
Its for the kids aint no matter what the price seems,
Happiness inna basket when I bring some Ice Cream,
There aint no happy endin but sometimes in the middle,
Cause fluids be low and we know that our skin is brittle,
Why we deserve this when we only wanna sin a little,
And this aint fair, nobody cares might as well starve the children,
But we remembered for laughter wit our names carved in buildins,
These the wicked visions of dead mens decisions scarred in millions,

*HooK* x 2

Doesnt have anything to do wit me, but just think about it.

*four holes is a crackhouse apartment building where u can get any kinda drug u want really, (not knowin if its cut or not) or u can get killed if they dont know you or remember you or like you.*

..alright..your flow was okay but way too simple...you showed virtullay no multis..your structure was okay...your vocab was below average..I don't mean use all so called 'Dictionary' words but you have to be more complex...peace...

Thanks, only thing i can argue wit here is the virtually no multi's, cause theres lots. But I'll work on the other shit bro... Pz.

you need to up your vocab and your structure try to even out your lines...