Yo, my name is PIK
my main style is to diss
it's easy here there's no risk
im not in detroit
debatin if im wrong or right
to reach for this one dream
herin girls scream
my name
it may sound lame
you see how my ryhmes flow
and this is my low
ill be rakin in the dough
youll be cheerin at my show
hate me love me
diss me well see
who's inkin with the pen
and playin concerts 10
in just one month
singin bout people locked up in the trunk
just because he was drunk
k now everyone letme here u holla
f fifty cent... im a dolla
i don't care what you say or what u think
cause eitha way im gettin inked

good wordplay but it lacks the umph to get attention try to add complexity

It was good.... the strong points were multies made the flow smoother
...and word play
the points you could work on is...
lengthing your bars, and try to stick to a topic(content),
Overall tho It was good, like they say "stay at" "keep working" become lyrically sophisticated!!!

Love for all lyricists!!!!
Promote it.....
James Jr.

what is this...this shit is garbage...
less than average wordplay was the only high point...
work on your flow, metas, multis, wordplay etc...
Elevate...
Keep Spittin...

another one gone down the drain...