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Old 07-16-02, 02:17 AM   #1
äBunçhå Thøughtž
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Red face Hello Boys And Girls....Heres My Version Of Ill....

IP: 87CE 4A4B



..."Heaven Meets Hell"....

....*looks into the sky*.....

Expressin My Stress As I'm Testin My Text
Progressin Thru Heaven Testin Whose Next
Divine Light Pushin Past Some Devious Pricks
Burn To The Center Of My Soul W/ 1000 Licks
Split Flaming Spit N Cool Down Demonic Shit
Squash Shit, W/ The Fist Of God On Every Hit
Watch As It, Severs Every Word Launched @ It
The Creature Bit, Soon After His Neck Was Slit
Coughin Up Flames, As It Fell Back In The Pit
Provin A Demon's Brain Is Nothing But Half-Wit
Dead In My Right Calf, But I Got The Last Laugh
As I Predicted Rhyme Schemes On A Bar Graph
Climb Stars, To Exude Heaven On My Battle Scars
And Touch All Angels W/ All Of My Battle Bars

....*looks down @ the ground*....

You Touch Heaven? I Teach Terror N Rip Grown Men
Tell Me When, I Can Release Pain W/ A Plastic Pen
Flow's Elastic, Put Fists In Bars N My Words R Drastic
Mr. Sarcastic, Strech The Truth And Say Ur Fantastic
Your Ill? Sure, Can Ride My Dick Jus To Feel Secure
Kill All That's Pure, Use Black Magic N Induce Torture
Teach Lessons In-Abuse N Rotate A-Cute Angles Obtuse
Heaven's An Excuse, Step-in Stools N Fasten The Noose
Lights Empty, Dark Envy, Heaven Can Hardly Avenge Me
Kill The Evil In Me? Like Hell Will Freeze Over Eventually

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Old 07-16-02, 03:58 PM   #2
äBunçhå Thøughtž
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dun sleep...
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Old 07-16-02, 04:09 PM   #3
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Yo son that was pretty tight, im was feelin it
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Old 07-16-02, 06:38 PM   #4
MR eS
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i think the rhyme was tight but wasnt following any particular pattern... like a story line.... truth is.. i dont know what was the point of writing this?

but the rhyme scheme was dope...


so id say...

3/5

good job dun... keep writin.
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Old 07-17-02, 09:05 AM   #5
RhetoriX
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I think this was nice, had some powerful lines but jus werent going no where, it looked like you were pushing a story through but it werent working... The rhyme scheme was iLL, the multies and rhythm was hella nice, flawless in mos places... Wordplay again was nice, similes were working all the way through, combining with the vocab produced some imagery... The vocab was there, strong in places and you gave a good knowledge, next time try spitting something with some substance, keep spitting and elevating...

Peez...
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Old 07-18-02, 11:19 PM   #6
äBunçhå Thøughtž
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its keystlyed...of course it doesnt have a point....
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Old 07-18-02, 11:26 PM   #7
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yo the shyt was plain phat son, that's all i gotta say. u straight killed it wit the multi's kid fa. this is some hot shit, but on the real i kinda got lost while i was readin it but some hot shyt tho keep postin

go reply to my shit slum flow-http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=17122
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Old 07-18-02, 11:52 PM   #8
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that was bangin son. I think you know what you're doing after all.. lol... newbie with a new meaning... and flow. The multi's were killer. keep em comin

pz
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Old 07-19-02, 02:12 PM   #9
äBunçhå Thøughtž
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uh huh...thanks....

imma go drop my latest
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