Some old stuff of mine.....trying 2 revise it.......all criticism welcome....



Shit i Dont even know whatz Real thought u loved me,What's really the deal?//
Foreal, im tired of playin games why you actin all shady The love i have 4 you is Crayze...//
Who's The Lady your supposedly with, lying to your friends saying how u had me Whipped//
My BiTCH??..yea, i think that's what you were 2 me but im fillin like killin , wondering to myself am i worth livin?//
Wait ,im lying to myself..... I was the Bitch//
You did have me whipped, you did ........
Shit is 4 real
Naw i cant belive it
I got played in my eyes And Love

I Fear it.

Man...as im writin im crying What im feeling is so deep i feel like dying
Why was he Lying??
Datz why my mother said always have high expectations
Cuz it will alwayz be a man who will chop ya heart into little sections.
Games played..

Love ??????

Naw...It Cant be why...Why am i foolin my self....

Mind Controllin


Im thinking bout making an audio of this.........hmmmmm

Holla

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<font color=red><b><font size=3>
<center>.:. BooChine.:.

CatCh yall asses on mY LATEST TRACK//
"Internet Rappers Spittin Garbage Raps"//
Cop Dat SinGle...Hoe...hehe lol...>>>>>>...SoThiCkWitIt...<<<<<<<img src=http://mi7.bpcdn.us/Chocalite_KiWi/b745.jpg>

this was decent, but seemed generic, your structure is atrocious, but maybe you havent been writing poems long? just tryo and use different vocabulary and spell check your words, keep elevating and dropping though, i am being honest here, not hate..1

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O Y D

*FluidMusic*


*Poetic Scriptures Moderator*