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Old 05-12-03, 07:32 PM   #1
rugbyred
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attack

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my lyrics will leave you dazed and confuzed
hittin so hard u gonna be feelin abused
dont try n hate or ull be sad after u lose
layin in yo coffin as i pay my rescpect and my dues
but remember no matter whateva u chose
yo mom is always gonna be fucking alot a dudes
she desert yo ass as it was a family feud
but then again there is no need to be crude
but yo mama's pussy smell like chinese food
so chin chin will lick it till its nice and smooth
lyrics getter hotter than big tigga in da booth
you think u a rapper cuz u got a platinum tooth
u just a wanksta with a cheap cotton pimp suit
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Old 05-12-03, 07:41 PM   #2
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well, this has an okay flow, and I liked how you rhymed the same sound a lot, but what I liked stops there. You need to work on punches if indeed you are trying to write a battle verse.Know that dazed and confused lines without wordplay are whack, yo mama lines are whack and played out, and using the word wanksta just pisses me off, I don't know why. You need to elevate vocab and try to use multis, and try to write verses that aren't the same as 90% of mainstream rap right now.
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Old 05-12-03, 07:59 PM   #3
Sureal
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wack..... need i say more?
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Old 05-12-03, 08:07 PM   #4
Bash
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Whack
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