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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
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06-12-03, 10:09 AM
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#1
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.BeTteR ThAn YoO!.
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"Last Breath"
IP:
"My Last Breath"
With the last breath left, I grace with traces of my air..// I always find my feet, look down in failure to see a pair..// Care takes itself and skates along with thin ice..// Experiences strike luck out, end near, missed out twice..// Vulnerable to the visions, reality and paradise entice..// Chances leave the hand as on the board hits dice..// Hope to be like archers with approach, straight to the point and concise..// Eyes connect with my figure, I’m a vulnerable soul..// I’m driven further down hall, and I’m distanced from ma goal..// I think bout sitting on ma lunch just to get on a roll..// Have you ever felt the hope drain from life, following the sweat..// I let my heart grow cold, I only got a license to Chill..// Will I ever be Ill? Still I hold on tight and sign off on ma will..// It smashes the heart down hard like a weight on ya chest..// Doubt instills the mind, should I once again wear the vest?..// Well I’m best when I feel safe but would I be cheating the test?..// Destined for a fate met by every single creation..// Why cheat it, why attest it, we all got a heavenly affiliation..// Who defeats it? Sin cannot get past, any-the-nation..// Touched by a soul, the long look on the face..// Sparks my mind to memories, of past moments in this place..// Speech erects my senses of sounds, I’m coherent to approach..// Advice given, “never allow anyone to take to pride and poach!”..// I’ma yield the attacks advanced upon myself and raise my shield..// As I swallow my pride with my “last breath” and take the field…… ........................Pz........................ ... |
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06-13-03, 04:15 AM
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#2
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.BeTteR ThAn YoO!.
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IP:
Ummmm can someone say...SLEEPERS.....Fuck....Peep this shit peoples...
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06-13-03, 12:17 PM
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#3
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Guest
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IP:
thoguht this was tight, it flowed brilliantly and the vocab was hott...
"It smashes the heart down hard like a weight on ya chest..// Doubt instills the mind, should I once again wear the vest?..//" - thought that was dope, OVERALL 8/10! keep droppin them! |
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06-13-03, 03:38 PM
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#4
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Straight Savage.
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IP:
this was very good, i expected more but you still delivered the shit..
__________________
Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?! |
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06-13-03, 05:30 PM
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#5
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Guest
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IP:
Dope illustrative flow my friend, i like it/
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06-14-03, 05:58 AM
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#6
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.BeTteR ThAn YoO!.
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IP:
Thunx for the luv haha....Any more replies sleepers??.....
........Pz.......... |
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06-14-03, 10:15 AM
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#7
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Guest
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IP:
Sick....Is all i got to say...
You had nice wordplay... Content was nice Flow was good, off in a little spots, But i still followed ya Topic was a good one I liked this peice alot... Hope to check out some of your other peices....Look fo mine.... ~Nothin but Love~ -out- |
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06-14-03, 10:30 AM
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#8
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.BeTteR ThAn YoO!.
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IP:
....Thunx no doubt....Uppin for some more replies....
........................Pz........................ ... |
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06-14-03, 10:34 AM
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#9
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Guest
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IP:
i thought it was hot......nice shit.....1
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06-14-03, 12:03 PM
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#10
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.BeTteR ThAn YoO!.
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IP:
Thunx..Good lookin out...Any more replies peeps...
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06-14-03, 12:45 PM
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#11
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Guest
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IP:
NICE SHIT MAN
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06-14-03, 04:53 PM
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#12
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Guest
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IP:
dat was dope
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06-14-03, 11:43 PM
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#13
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.BeTteR ThAn YoO!.
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IP:
^^Well SaiD^^...haha...Uppin for some more replies....
.............Pz............... |
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